New on the block

Selfish

Cesar and Oscar get back about an hour after Monse calls and she waits for them on the couch alone. "Hey beautiful, sorry it took so long." Cesar smiles but Monse just sits with her arms crossed. "Why didn't you answer the phone?" Monse asks. "Ok I'm gonna go, this isn't my problem." Oscar laughs. "We were busy and I knew if something was really wrong you'd call Ruby." Cesar says as he sits down and puts Monse's legs on his lap. "Mm-hmm or you were busy tagging some Prophet shit." Monse says as she flips his hands over and reveals the paint that splattered onto them. "It's not dangerous I promise." Cesar holds her hands tightly. "No, if it wasn't dangerous you would've answered the phone. Olivia said she heard you were getting deeper into the gang, is she right?" Monse asks. Cesar considera lying but he can't do that to her again. "Yeah, she's right." Cesar says without making eye contact. "Why? I just got shot, do you want one of us to die? The bullets were meant for you, you're lucky no one died!" Monse shouts. "I'm doing it to keep you safe! Why don't you understand that? All I've been doing since you got here, every decision has been to keep you safe." Cesar claims. "How are you going to keep me safe if you end up in jail or dead?" "The Santos are a family and we protect each other. It doesn't matter what happens to me as long as I'm a Santo you'll be protected!" Cesar says. "Being safe and being protected aren't the same thing Cesar!" Monse yells. "What else can I do? If I could leave we would be in even more danger!" Cesar says. "Jamal found the money." Monse says in a calm voice. "Seriously?" Cesar asks. "Yeah, and the first thing he said is we needed to make a plan to get you out." Monse informs Cesar. "I can get out." Cesar doesn't sound excited or scared he just sounds confused. "What's wrong?" Monse asks. "Nothing, this is what we want. I guess I should start planning?" Cesar says but it comes out like a question. Both of them sit in silence and Cesar feels like he has a lump in his throat. A question is burning inside of him but he's terrified of the answer. "Do you want to come with me?" He finally asks. "Go with you where?" Oscar asks when he walks into the living room. "To take a walk, exercise and fresh air and shit." Cesar says quickly. He looks at his older brother who raised him and Cesar can't imagine leaving him behind. "Are you stupid? Freeridge doesn't have fresh air." Oscar says before he drinks some more beer. "Yeah, besides what if I go out there and run into more people you pissed off." Monse sighs. There's an awkward silence mainly because when Monse says this Cesar and Oscar both feel guilty that she got caught in their problems. "Can you pass me a beer?" Monse asks Oscar and he nods. "No, 'cause you're on like three kinds of pain killers and all of them say you can't." Cesar stops his brother. "You're the reason I got shot now you want to deprive me of some beer? Thanks so much for "protecting" me." Monse rolls her eyes. "What the fuck is wrong with you guys?" Oscar asks and they both glare at him. "I'm gonna go outside and not be apart of this novela." Oscar says as he joins the other Santos outside. "I'm not trying to hurt you." Cesar says. "I know, but I can't go with you when you leave, and I don't want you to leave but I don't want you to be a Santo." Monse says sadly. "I know, but I don't think I could leave you and Oscar and... wait what do you mean you don't want me to leave?" Cesar asks. "I mean, I love you and I don't want you to leave Freeridge and never see me again. I know it's selfish but it's true." Monse admits. "It's not selfish, I would be the same way if your dad wanted to move back to Inglewood. We both know that no matter what happens it won't be perfect." Cesar sighs. "Why can't it? Bribe your brother and stay here." Monse says. "No, because as long as I'm in Freeridge I'm a Santo." Cesar pulls his cross out from behind his shirt. "This might as well be a giant billboard above my head." Cesar says. "But you're not just a Santo." "That doesn't matter to the Prophets or literally any other gang." Cesar tells Monse. "That's it." Monse stands up slowly and walks to one of the bags she told Cesar she needed from her house. "Sit back down you shouldn't be carrying anything." Cesar says as he grabs the bag quickly. Monse snatches her bag back from him and sits down. "I stole all this stuff from my dad. Everything in here is proof that you can get out." Monse pulls out pictures, a stack of cash, a bunch of receipts from different pharmacies on the same days, and an old college acceptance letter. "My dad went from buying a shit tone of stuff to make meth, to getting accepted into UCLA, to working for your dad, to meeting my mom because of it, to being a truck driver and getting out of Freeridge. He might be back but it was his choice." Monse says as she arranges everything. "What's your point?" Cesar asks. "My dad decided not to be selfish almost all of his life until he realized what was important. Right now is the time for you to be selfish because your life is important. So forget about me, and the Santos, and everything else that's holding you back. What do you really want to do?" Monse asks. "I want to leave... with you, Jamal and Ruby. You guys aren't holding me back you're pushing me forward. Yeah I got deeper in the Santos but you guys are always in my head making sure I don't do something stupid. I'm not leaving any of you because if I do I'll lose everything. I am gonna be selfish, I'm not letting anyone tell me to go this is my decision and I'm not leaving until we all get out." Cesar says as he kneels by Monse. She looks into her boyfriend's eyes and tries to see if this is what he really wants. He leans forward and kisses her when Oscar walks back in. "Wow you guys are literally some crazy shit. Every time I leave the room you change your mood." He shakes his head. "Why do you have a stack of cash though?" Cesar asks. "That's blood money, he's had it on his nightstand for as long as I can remember. He got paid to do worse shit than you've done and he got out and got happy. He never forgets where he came from that's why it doesn't matter if you leave." Monse whispers so Oscar can't hear her. "He hid the rest. He swears he won't spend it because that money was someone's life. I used to think it was some motivation bs. That's how I know this isn't it for you." Monse says. "I know this isn't it for me, because I don't want this life for you and I'm not letting any other guy give you the future you deserve." Cesar assures Monse.