Early Stages

Singularity

My singularity;
Peculiarity
I couldn't accept myself

I could not accept
My uniqueness
Developing many fronts to hide

You see my bright sides
You see positive qualities
You don't expect anything less

You believe in my acts
To the point that it's reality
And I repress myself even more

I'm one person
But just how far
Does my singularity last?

I have many people
With different sides
Battling for control

The person you saw
Was one I didn't know
But I don't think you knew that either

Every time we meet
I'm someone else
Someone that isn't me

I hear something loud
Is that a crack?
I try to tune it out

But I found its source
And it was me
Awake in the dungeon I'd drowned

I see myself
Trapped inside
Where I had abandoned me

I try to silence me
Keep me frozen
Buried away from the light

Arms around my throat
To silence my voice
And put me back to sleep

But I know one day
This façade will burn away
And reveal the skeleton that's now me

I'm still struggling
Trapped inside
Trapped deep within myself

I stretch towards the light
Towards myself
Begging to be set free

Did I lose myself?
Is my voice fake?
Had I thrown myself away?

If I one day crumble
If I break away
Tell me, what should I do?

Would you help me?
Would you trust me?
Would you even look at me?

Would you still like me
If you realised
What I'd done to the true me?

~

We are all unique. However, I think we are all familiar with what society sometimes tends to do with individuals and things that are unique.

We learn to hide the true parts of ourselves, some doing it more than others. Some may hide certain traits, opinions or likes while others hide their entirety. If you compare the person they are versus the person that everyone knows, you find that they are completely different.

If you were to ask someone what kind of person I am, you'd find that you'd get very different responses depending on who you asked.

It's almost like a defence mechanism. This isn't always all bad but, depending on how you treat the soul you have locked away within your body, you find that it can become dangerous. You become damaged and broken. 

You lose your sense of identity.

Sometimes it's hard to accept ourselves for who we are or even discover ourselves in the first place but when we become comfortable with who we are; whether or not a few select persons know or the entire world, it makes things a whole lot easier for yourself if not society.

Until next time,
Ade Alethra