Torn Apart (A Daryl Dixon/ The Walking Dead Fanfiction)

Chapter 43

Cat's P.O.V
I stare out the window into the black sky, the stars sewn into the dark backdrop. I sigh and lean further back against the window payne, pulling my feet up onto the ledge. Further down the hill, the sound of the babbling brook was soothing to the ears. I look over and see the others asleep, the first peacefulness I've seen settled over the group.

I am on watch, keeping eyes and ears out for any dangers to our group. So far, the night had been quiet and uneventful. Everyone was exhausted and I decided that it was only fair that I take the first watch. Everyone was outraged and strongly disagreed with my decision, especially Daryl. But when they all began to yawn and droop their eyes, my point was proven.

I have been observing the night sky for a few hours now, watching the clouds run across the heavens. We were not long away from our destination, Terminus. It had been a week since Daryl returned and I couldn't be more happy. However Daryl began to understand what it was like to care for a pregnant woman. I have been emotional, my feelings swiftly changing from angry to weepy. I had also been experiencing quite a round of morning sickness, which made him thoroughly concerned. He was extremely supportive and comforting, always making sure that I was catered for. My love for him continues to grow everyday, yet sometimes I feel his distance.
The relationship between Daryl and the others is less tense, except for his relationship with Rick. Both men have stilted conversations with one another, making the group dynamic become somewhat uncomfortable. Both men constantly cater to my needs, which was both a blessing and a curse.

I look over to the men and examine their first peaceful moment in weeks. Rick was laying on his back, both Carl and Judith curled into him in either side. This was sight I most enjoyed because it was when I could truly appreciate the concept of family in this rotten world. I turn and see Daryl laying a little ways away from them, on his side facing me. His face was totally relaxed, his body moving in a steady rhythm. I smile at my beautiful husband, wondering how I could ever deserve a man like him. At that moment I feel a movement inside of my belly and I smile widely.

"What are you doing up baby?" I ask, running my belly.

It was times like these that I was grateful for everyone to be asleep. Every night I would speak to my child, even though it seems like a stupid thing to do, it is a relaxing technique. I sit there and stroke my stomach soothingly.

"We're nearly there baby. One more day and then we can be safe."

I close my eyes for a second and have a peaceful moment if my own.

"We will be safe."

I look around and see Rick staring at me, his thumbs looped in his belt loops. He walks over and takes a seat opposite me on the window sill. He settles his back against the wall and looks at me.

"I hope so." I say, looking back outside.

"I'll make sure that we are safe. I won't let anything happen to us."

"I know Rick." I say, rubbing his shoulder soothingly.

He grasps my hand and stares out the window, "If this place fails, I'm not sure what I will do."

"Rick-"

"I can't let anything else happen. Too many lives have been lost because of me. Hershel, Shane, Lori..." He drops his head in his hands.

I shuffle closer and wrap my arms around him, holding him tight against my chest. His arms wrap around my waist as he cries into my shoulder, the rocking of his body ricocheting through me.

"Rick, you are a wonderful man. You have led this group through so much and have been an incredible leader for us. No one else would have done a greater job than you. We believe in you Rick, why can't you?" I say.

He lifts his head up to look into my eyes, "I have done bad things, I am not a good man. I will do anything to make sure that Carl and Judith and everyone else in this group will be safe. You saw what I did back there, I am not a good man."

I rest my hand on his cheek, "You are a wonderful man who has the biggest heart. I am so grateful that I have you by my side, that you are so willing to risk your life for me. There is nothing in this world I can do to repay you."

Rick's eyes capture mine, containing such raw emotion. His eyes flicker to my lips and his tongue flicks out, moistening his own. He leans forward slowly, his eyes fluttering shut. Before his lips can touch mine, I turn my head towards the window. His lips press against my cheek momentarily before moving away. He opens his eyes, confusion flooding them.

"I can't do this." I say.

"Why not?" He questions.

I turn to look him in the eyes, "I love Daryl. He is my husband and the father of my child, nothing in this world will change that."

Rick looks down and away. I sigh and pull his head back to face me.

"It doesn't mean I don't love you too, it's just different. You are one of my protectors, my confidant, my best friend. But Daryl is my world and I wouldn't have it any other way."

His face drops and is covered with saddness. I lean forward and kiss him in the cheek for a long second. I swing around off the window sill and walk towards the man of my life. He is peacefully asleep, unaware of what was about to take place. I lift his arm off his side and snuggle into him, his warmth instantly welcomed. I press my lips to him lightly and his arms instinctively encircle me. I sigh and drift off into a peaceful sleep.