My Secret Guardian // song minho (#19)

Chapter 49

Miwon

I thought that I will be alright being kidnapped by someone for almost 24 hours and it is probably longer than I thought, being shut in the dark makes you forget the concept of time and especially with all of the stupid music that is blasting through my headphones, it is really affecting me a lot and I can't wait to get out of this nonsense.

I just want all of this music to end and for me to stop singing the lyrics in my head which I shouldn't be doing, it is a mind trick that the military uses to make their suspects own up to their crimes and it is a very ridiculous but smart way of dealing with those people who wouldn't tell anyone about their darkest secrets that they tried so hard to hide it.

And the thing is that I didn't do anything wrong but yet I am being locked up, being confined to this ridiculous punishment just to make me lose some brain cells and hopefully think that I will become dumb and crazy after this experience.

I bet that is what Nam Daehwan wanted me to become because he hated me back in high school, I was one of the smartest students in my high class because I was born with a higher IQ than the other students and I didn't really have to study for my examinations not because I was born smart but I studied a lot in my free time, thus helping to achieve my reputation of being the smartest kid in class who is also an outcast.

He hated me because I was smart and he wasn't as intelligent as he should be if he knew that he wasn't as bright, he should've invested all his time in his studies and going to tuition centres instead of becoming a gangster and that ruined his whole life. Being a gangster is the worst choice that any men or women in the planet should do, it is both risky and dangerous at the same time, there is no good thing that comes out of it by becoming a gangster and your life is already ruined from the moment that you included yourself with them.

And he made that choice, thus ruining his entire future with his own decisions. And he still wants to blame me for ruining Song Minho's life by pulling him out of the gangster lifestyle, I am helping him secure a good future and extend his lifespan as well, most gangsters usually don't live past the age of 40 because they will die in some way where they chose it for themselves.

I could think of ways to curse Nam Daehwan about his bad life decision but I am really tired by not doing anything at all, the situation that I am in right now is making me feel restless and I can't wait to get out of it. I am feeling scared and I feel like there is no way of getting out of here at all, the music will only keep repeating itself and I will forever be stuck in that time loop that repeats over and over again without stopping.

I just want this to stop right now but I don't have the energy to even do that, my energy is draining out very quickly and I want to give up this instant. Minho... I need you right now...

But it is my fault that I am in this situation right now if I hadn't got close to Minho back in the first year of high school up till the 3rd year where I was tasked to pass him his assignments for the week and that made his gang members angry at me for doing that. If I hadn't got involved with Song Minho in the first place, nothing would have happened between the two of us, he will continue to be his gangster self and not want to study to get into a good university, and I will finally be able to migrate to New Zealand and live the life that I always have wanted since I was a child, to live a life that no one can control me, to live a life without the toxic people in my life.

In that way, our lives will not ever clash with each other and no one gets hurt in the process and I definitely won't get kidnapped and being punished to listen to childhood theme songs on an endless loop. At least things wouldn't be as complicated as this if we hadn't fallen in love with each other.

I really regret all the life decisions that I had made in my life now, because of me, Song Minho is suffering and I am nothing to him but a parasite and I needed to get away from him as far as possible. I will not make his life better at all, he is only going to suffer even more when I am in his life.

I felt the earphones being lifted up and away from my ears, I could finally hear silence and that natural ambience that I could never get with the music that was blasting through the headphones for the past 24 hours. The cloth in my mouth and around my eyes was removed as well and I could finally see light after such a long time, it was if I was the end of the tunnel and I am finally out of the tunnel.

I squinted my eyes as the sudden shift in the brightness levels hurt my eyes, trying to adjust to the brightness. "Na Miwon... I'm sorry for coming so late..." I was pulled into an embrace by Song Minho who sounded so relieved that he finally got me out of this madness, he was crying and his two other friends were smiling at this moment that we are having but I wasn't happy at all.

I wasn't happy because I knew that I wasn't the right person for him and he should be with someone who doesn't bring him any troubles at all, I have to leave him as soon as possible so that he will live a better lifestyle without any suffering. I wanted to get out of his embrace but I collapsed immediately due to the harsh conditions that I was being put through and I needed medical attention right away.