playful fate

Chapter 36

BRAIDE'S POV

I closed my eyes when I felt a breeze air touching my skin, everyone's on their grief here in a solemn place. A place wherein you letting go a person you love even if it's hurt, place wherein the memories would be together buried, the last moment of ours would be ended here.

How can I let you go?

If my heart always beat on you?

How can I move on?

If the memories will be stay together in my heart?

If letting you go makes everyone satisfy, fuck them I will follow you.

Zarrah Niccole Fuentes, Rest in Paradise.

If letting you go makes you happy, I will. But do you ever think me? Because baby, I can't. I can't let you go.

I slowly open my eyes and tears stream down my face. I lost a grip to a bird and I follow a gaze of it while flying farther on me. Freed.

I bowed when I heard an instrumental music, it's so cold. Everyone look at me, waiting me to walk towards a white coffin... a bed of Zarrah's body. I slowly walk towards of her coffin and took the handkerchief from my pocket.

"O-open it."

Dahan-dahang binuksan ang kaniyang kabaong. I smell the sweet aroma of her, I smiled. Nilagay ko ang panyo sa aking labi at hinalikan ito at dahan-dahang nilagay ko ito sa kamay ni Zarrah. Naramdaman ko ang lamig ng kaniyang kamay kung kaya't dumaloy muli ang mga luhang kanina pa nagbabadya. Hinalikan ko siya sa noo at naramdaman ang lamig nito, lamig na ngayon ko na lang mararamdaman. Dahan-dahan akong bumitaw at humakbang papalayo, yumuko na lamang ako at tahimik na umiyak sa tabi.

"Braide..." mahinang bulong ni Graciela habang hinahaplos ang aking likod. Agad ko itong niyakap at humagulgol sa kaniyang balikat, hindi ko na kaya.

Iilan pang mga kaibigan ang humaplos sa aking likod at niyakap ako, sinasamahan ako sa pagdadalamhati.

"I can't..." mahinang sabi ko at patuloy na umiyak sa balikat ni Graciela.

"She's... happy now."

"What about me?" Agap na tanong ko.

"She don't want to see you like this Braide. I'm sure of it, ayaw niyang nakikita kang umiiyak."

"Then why she left me?"

Hindi na muling nagsalita si Graciela, hinayaan niya na lamang ako na umiyak ng umiyak sa kaniyang balikat.

"Braide..."

Natigilan ako nang marinig ang pagtawag sa akin ng mommy ni Zarrah. Bumitaw ako sa pagkakayakap kay Graciela at hinarap ito. She's smiling at me but behind of her sunglasses, I know there's a tears of her eyes.

"Let's talk."

Nagkatinginan kaming magkakaibigan at nakuha naman nila ang nais iparating ni Tita. Tumango ako kay Graciela at ngumiti lang ito sa akin, umalis sila at iniwan kami ni Tita.

"Braide thank you for loving Zarrah." Panimula nito habang naglalakad kami papalayo.

Kakatapos lang na ilibing si Zarrah at nag-uumpisa na ring magsialisan ang mga tao.

"I know you're in pain. But Braide let me tell you this... Zarrah is sick."

Tila ba nabingi ako sa narinig kaya naman napahinto ako sa paglakad at naluluhang tinitigan si Tita. She remove her sunglasses and wipe her tears, she smiled on me but I couldn't help to smile back.