ONE-SHOTS (YouTubers x Reader)

Help {Jack x Reader}

Third Person P.O.V.

The Brighton rain reflected her mood. (Y/n) sat at her computer. Just crying. She was struggling to hold on, to keep going, to keep doing this. Her camera sat lonesome in the corner, waiting to be turned on. Her fans were waiting for content. But she was loosing herself. She couldn't handle it anymore. She was insecure and put more hate on herself then any hatful commenters. Nobody else knew that though. But her fans were starting to notice some things. How tired she always looked. How her smile didn't quite reach her eyes. How her laugh wasn't quite as joyous. It'd been sounding hollow. Broken. It was all fake. And act. A show. "Oh I'm ok." She'd lie, and put on a fake smile. But she wasn't okay. She was drowning in her own black hole. She hated herself. She didn't want to, but she did.

How can I feel this bad? Is it selfish of me? I get to spend my days playing idea games for a job! I love my job. I'm a horrible person. Why can't I just be grateful for what I have? I'm such a fucking crybaby. What do I have to complain about?

And these were the more pleasant thoughts. By now, she had moved to her bed with a tear stained face. She felt tired, but she wasn't going to sleep. She hadn't in awhile. Fans were starting to get concerned. She hadn't uploaded or posted anything for two weeks now. She'd gone into a total media shut down. She hadn't even realized the time that's passed. She wanted to disappear. The fans had a basic sense of how she felt, she often made self deprecating jokes in her videos, but nobody could see how broken she truly was. And sometimes, that's what kept her up at night. The thoughts plaguing her head. They love that I hate myself. The comments making notes on said jokes made her wonder. They love that I hate myself. But I don't want to hate myself.

The fans weren't the only ones who were worried. Jack was also worried. Jack and (Y/n) were good friends, and both wanted to be something more, but never had the courage to say anything. Jack has noticed the lack of enthusiasm in (Y/n), and the sudden internet disappearance. He had tried calling her multiple time, and dozens of texts, but he never got a response. So today, we decided to just show up at her home. It was kinda late at this point, but he didn't care. He knocked on her door, but there was no response. He knocked again, louder. "(Y/n), please open the door. It's me." He called. Inside, (Y/n) was freaking out. She didn't want Jack to see her this way, a pile of shattered glass in her bed. She sprang from her bed, quickly using makeup to hide the tear stains, and throwing clothes on. Her hair was a bit messy, but she decided to leave it. She put on a forced smile, and opened the door before Jack would knock again.

"Sorry Jack, I was in the bathroom. What's up?" She asked with a cheery smile. Or she thought it was cheery. Jack wasn't so convinced. It seems...off putting to him. She looked at his concerned face, and frowned a little. "Is something wrong?" She asked him. "That's what I came to ask you." He replied. She laughed, but it wasn't as loud as her laugh usually was. "Of course I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?" "Can I come in?" She nodded, and move away from the door. "(Y/n), what's going on?" Jack asked once inside. "What do you mean?" Jack took a breathe. "Don't lie to me, (Y/n). You've been silent for two weeks, haven't responded to my text or calls, and I can tell the difference between your smile and the front you put on. (Y/n), talk to me." He pleaded, his voice level the entire time. (Y/n) bit her lip. She didn't want to give in, but she knew he wouldn't let it go now. There was so much turmoil in her, so much self hate, so much pain. She couldn't keep it in. She started sobbing. Jack immediately pulled her into a hug.

"I'm so tired of everything. I don't want to do this anymore. I don't want to feel this way. I want it to go away. I hate myself. I hate myself, and I feel so selfish for hating myself." She cried out. Jack was stunned. He lead her to sit on the couch, where she buried her head in his chest. "(Y/n), you are not selfish for feeling this way. These feelings go after anyone and everyone. You just can't bottle them up. Let people help you. Let me help you. You'll get through this." Jack shushes. (Y/n)'s makeup has disappeared in the tears. She looked up at him, and he could see how truly tired she looked. "Thank you Jack. I-I want help." She admitted. He smiles softly. "Then I'll help you get better. But right now, I think you should get some sleep. It's late." She nodded, listening to him. Jack lifted her bridal style, and set her in her bed. He was about to leave, when she grabbed his wrist. "Please stay." He thought about it for a moment, then nodded. He removed his shoes, then laid on the bed next to her. She immediately cuddled into his side, not that he minded. "I promise, it'll get better." He whispered to her. And though he didn't see it, she fell asleep with the faint trace of a genuine smile.