My Hero Academia: Hell is a Mess

Fake Date for Chocolate

Prompt: Izuku and Bakugo fake date for chocolate.
This is based on something that happened in Discord, but I'm going to put my twist on it.
Warning: Panic Attack

Look, I know this is supposed to be something funny, but you people aren't giving me angsty shit.
I want angsty shit. So that's what I did.

---

Today is a rather calm day. Right now, I'm kicking Zashi's ass in Mario Kart as Zashi leans on Shouta who is sitting on the couch behind us.

"WHAT THE FUCK, IZUKU?! THIS GAME IS RIGGED! THIS IS THE THIRD TIME IN A ROW YOU HAVE WON!" Zashi rages as he throws the controller at the television.

Welp, that bitch is broken.

I huff, "Damn. I didn't even get to celebrate my win. Screw you, Zashi." I feel a flick on my head, "Ow! The fuck?"

I turn around to see Shouta glaring at me as he is the one to flick me, "Don't talk like that, brat. Zashi, don't use your quirk or break the television."

"Fine. Now, what are we going to do?!" Zashi groans.

"You're the one who broke the damn thing. You tell me."

Jeopardy music plays for the moment before a bright idea strikes his head, "You fix it!'

"Hell no. I'm making you suffer. JUST SO EVERYONE KNOWS, ZASHI IS THE ONE TO BREAK THE TELEVISION THIS TIME!" I announce as I hop on my feet.

"Petty."

"Mhm. I wasn't the one to throw the remote at the TV."

Shouta sighs, " You both are acting childish."

A loud voice interrupts, "I GOT CHOCOLATE!"

Chocolate? I spin on my toes to see Nemuri with two large boxes of chocolate.

"CHOCOLATE!" I squeal as I walk over. However, Nemuri stops me.

"Nope, this isn't for you. This is for the boys." She says with a grin as she hands the boxes over. I tilt my head aside.

"Why?"

"They are dating, so it's for a celebration. Besides, you aren't suppose to have sugar." Welp, here's my depression.

. . .

Wait a moment.

I face Nemuri, "If I start dating someone, will I get chocolate?"

Shouta is quick to pick up on what's going on," Nemuri, no-"

She interrupts, "Sure! Have someone in mind?"

"Todoroki!" I exclaim. However, Shouta quickly shoots down that plan.

"Problem child, you have asked Todoroki multiple times, and every time he has said no."

"Stop ruining my dreams. Give me a few minutes." I mutter as I walk out.

Shouta turns to face Nemuri, "Great. You're teaching him that if he dates, he gets food. That's wrong."

"I need drama, okay?"

---

I burst my way into class 1-A dorm.

"WHO WANTS TO FAKE DATE ME FOR CHOCOLATE?!" I scream at the top of my lungs.

Everyone was in the common room, so they all face me.

"Nobody should date someone for food, Izuku." Momo tries to inform me gently.

"Does it look like I care? I'll share half." Everyone says no, "WHY?!"