Holding Onto You

Ch 43

Maya's pov

It's at 12 in the afternoon before Bailey wakes up and I laugh, "Did you finally get a good sleep?" I ask.

"Yeah, did you?" She asks.

"Mmm, somewhat. Could've been better, but my head was hurting so I didn't get the best of sleep." I admit.

She frowns, "I'm sorry Maya."

I shrug, "It's ok. I mean I could've ended up much worse. I'm lucky I just have to endure migraines."

Of course they hurt, but I'm thankful that this is the most of my pain. I'll eventually be able to walk and get all my mobility back. So this will be all I'll be left with to endure which is ok. I can live with this. It's not the worst thing ever.

I mean there's people who suffer with chronic migraines and were just born with that. Mine may be because of a car accident, but if other people can live with chronic migraines than I can deal with my migraines. I'm not going to make a big deal out of it. I'm fortunate to have ended up with this being the worst thing.

"How are you feeling now?" She asks.

"Ok, I have a faint headache but nothing terrible."

"I can get you some medicine." She offers.

I shake my head, "I'm alright. My dad made lunch if you're hungry. My mom made me eat an hour ago though."

"Not right now, I'll probably be hungry in an hour." She says.

"I got the answers to the questions by the way, you owe me $20."

"Do I now?" She asks.

"Indeed you do. She said my grandparents didn't even know she did glee and it wasn't until Cool For The Summer when she told them about her sexuality. The only person who knew from the start was my dad." I say.

She looks flabbergasted, "I know right. I was a bit surprised too. I won the bet though." I smirk.

Yes Bailey and I really betted on this. I knew there was no way my mom told my grandparents that she was bisexual during glee, or even after she filmed the music video for Really Don't Care. I wanted my $20 ok. I had to get the answers.

"Damn, I was certain she came out after Glee."

"Nope, you can ask her if you want." I say.

"Yeah, absolutely not. I'm not asking your mom about her sexuality. That's weird, definitely not happening. I'll take your word for it and give you the $20." She says.

"And I told her I was lesbian."

"Woah woah woah, when did all this happen?" She asks.

"You were sleeping hard, this morning when she forced me to eat breakfast." I say.

"She didn't see us cuddling did she? She didn't suspect anything right?" She asks nervously.

"No, you sorta moved last night and when I woke up you weren't even by me anymore really. Which I guess worked out because it lead to her thinking we are nothing more than friends."

"Was this a one time thing or something she's going to do every morning?" She asks.

"Probably every morning until I can get up and get my own food. I think she's trying to make sure I actually eat now after the doctors said something to her." I say.

"So we need to be careful then. What happened last night isn't something we can just keep doing." She says.

"Well I wouldn't say that. I mean once my parent's go to sleep were kinda fine." I say.

"Maya I don't think we can afford to get caught, not right now at least. If you want me to actually be able to continue to stay then they need to think we aren't anything more than friends. Babe, seriously."

I know she's right, I just don't like the idea of no make out sessions or cuddling. However I don't like the idea of my parents finding out about us even more. So I have to do what I have to in order to make them think we are just friends.

"I know, I know. We'll stop. I'd rather you be able to at least lay beside me than my parents know about us and you not be allowed to stay the night because they think we'll actually have sex." I mumble.

"You seemed up for it yesterday, why do you sound disgusted by it now?" She asks.

I turn my head to her to see her eyebrows furrowed with her forehead wrinkled. I break the eye contact feeling uncomfortable with the question, "I don't know, I guess I trusted you enough to go further and wasn't fully thinking about what would actually happen if we did. You're right, I don't think I'm really ready to go that far yet. I think if we would've actually done it I would've just freaked out over actually wanting to do it."

"I wouldn't ever hurt you, but I get how you'd be scared to do anything after something like that. I'd be mortified to feel nothing but pain too. I don't think you've exactly self pleasured before or even know it can feel good. I know it can feel good, I've self pleasured before. You've only felt pain and know it can hurt. It'll take time to be ready Maya, I know. I'm never going to force you to do something you aren't ready to do. I'd never hurt you either. We don't have to rush into anything. I'm willing to wait as long as you need to ok?" She says.

"I know you are."

"And if we do decide to do it and you aren't at all comfortable then we'll stop. I can live without sex, I'm not dating you for sex. I'm dating you for your heart, mind, and personality. Well, and the fact your drop dead gorgeous. I mean oh my fucking god." She says.

I give a weak smile, "Thanks."

"Of course."

"So movie day?" I ask.

"I'm down."

I poke my lip out and give her puppy eyes, "Twilight?"

She raises an eyebrow, "Twilight?" She asks.

"Please?"

She sighs, "Ok. If it'll cheer you up and make you happy."

I sit up and peck her lips, "It will."

I grab my tv remote and turn my tv on and open hulu, "I can't believe I'm really doing this. Do you know how much I love you? I hate the idea of watching this."

"Yeahhhh, you're the best." I smile.

I click the first movie in the series and drop my tv remote onto my bed. I lay down and get comfortable as Bailey sits up on the bed. I feel her hand find mine and I give a smile as I feel her fingers interlock with mine.

"Dad wants to know if you've heard from Ava." I hear.

I turn my head to Emilio, "Uhh, I didn't hear from her. She sent me a snapchat earlier of her just doing streaks. She's alive and well, that's all the information I have though."

"Shes at Jacobs isn't she?" He asks.

"I don't know. She told me she was staying at a friends house because she wanted a bit of space. If she is, then that means she lied to me too." I lie.

He stares at me for a few moments, "Huh, you're not getting nervous. Alright. I'll tell dad." He says.

Well maybe I am a better liar than I receive credit for. Or maybe I'm just becoming a better liar. Either way, it doesn't matter. I just convinced my little brother that Ava wasn't at Jacobs. I'm a bit proud of myself if I'm honest. They usually always see through my lies.

I turn my head back to my tv and feel Bailey caress the top of my hand with her thumb, "Nice, you're actually getting better. I'm a bit worried. When did you get good at lying?" She asks.

"I don't even know, I was just thinking the same thing."

I guess all the lying I did in the hospital is what lead to me getting better at this lying stuff. I did a lot of it there and that's the only thing I can think of that has helped me get better at it. I guess I do have something to thank them for after all the things I have on my list to not thank them for. Who knew.