Imagine [L.H]

62

LUKE'S POV:

"I've done it before, only once I think," Ellie said, holding out her wrist for me to see. A scar folded around her wrist, almost like a bracelet.

I frowned and held out my wrists for her to see, cuts scattered my arm like broken glass. Not a single untainted spot was to be seen. And when I ran out of room, I moved to my stomach, then to my thighs.

"You really should stop," Ellie frowned, tracing her small fingers over the healing cuts.

"Why should I?" I whispered, taking back my arm and pulling down my sleeve.

"You're risking your life with each cut," she said matter-of-factly.

"You don't get it...do you?" I asked, raising an eyebrow at her.

She rolled her eyes, "You can't become suicidal just because you and your lover were parted."

"No, it's not that. I'm starting to accept the fact that we're basically on different ends of the world."

"Then what?" She asked slowly, furrowing her eyebrows.

"Call me crazy," I paused. "But I saw her-like in my mind? I don't really understand how it works, but I heard her voice, I saw her hands. She heard me too, someone had...hit her and I told her to hit him back and she did it," I explained, kicking my legs in the air.

Ellie said she'd try and be a "therapist," so I reluctantly let her play the role.

"Yeah," Ellie said slowly. "You are crazy."

"I think I am going crazy," I whispered, kicking a pebble.

"What did you...see?"

"I was in my room with um Katy, that's when I saw her. The memory is faint, all I could remember is blonde hair, green eyes, and I think I even heard...moans," I explained.

"So whoever she was with was..." She trailed off.

"Yeah," I nodded, feeling a pang in my chest at the thought of her having sex with someone.

"I'm sorry," Ellie said sadly, she put a comforting hand on my knee and smiled sadly at me when I looked down at her.

"I-I just t-thought that because of th-the Love Mark th-that she'd stay faithful," I cried, rubbing frantically at my eyes.

I don't like crying, but it now feels like a hobby. It's something I do everyday, I fall asleep crying, I sometimes wake up crying. All I've been doing is shedding tears and I'm getting sick of it.

"You did say that the Mark makes people really horny," Ellie said, trying to lighten the mood.

I laughed quietly, rubbing at my eyes.

"Enough about me," I breathed out. "Why'd you do it?" I asked, pointing at my wrist.

Ellie shifted slightly in her spot before answering. "It wasn't too long ago actually. Maybe about two weeks ago. I like to block out my feelings and put them second before anything else. I let myself cry once and everything caught up to me. I processed the fact that I was alone but it only made me feel worse," Ellie explained, I saw how she glared at the - very visible -scar on her wrist.

"I hate my scars too," I said after a few moments of silence.

"Don't hate your scars," Ellie said quickly. "Appreciate the scars because you let go of the cuts. Scars are marks that prove you've succeed at defeating the negative thoughts."

I nodded slowly and tugged down my beanie slightly so it covered my ears.

"You're a good therapist," I laughed, scratching my arms through my sweater.

Ellie and I were outside, peacefully swinging on an old, creaky set of swings that was behind our house when we had found it. She had asked me to open up and I was completely willing to talk if she was.

"I miss Lee," she whispered, closing her eyes and leaned back slightly.

"I know," I said softly. "He sounded like a nice man," I smiled.

Ellie suddenly opened her eyes and scoffed, "You say that like he's dead."

"I'm sure he's fine," I assured her.

"He was suicidal after Marie died," Ellie said with a blank stare as she looked upwards at the cloudy sky.

"Did he have the um Mark?" I asked out of curiosity.

"He had this weird circle shaped scar, so I'm assuming he did," she shrugged.

Silence.

"I caught him once with a bottle of pills," Ellie whispered. I could see her eyes welling up in tears as she sniffled.

"Don't force yourself to not cry El," I said softly. "Sometimes crying helps."

Ellie frantically shook her head. "Crying is for the weak and I am not weak," she said bluntly.

"Don't keep in all your emotions," I frowned.

"You don't get it do you!" She yelled. I flinched back at her tone and almost fell off my swing.

"If I shed one tear I will break down and I don't want that!" Ellie continued, voice raising even more.

"I'll help you through the break downs and tears, though."

She smiled sadly as a tear rolled down her cheek. I automatically stood up from my swing and hugged her.

She snuggled into my chest and let out quiet sobs. "I don't want t-to be alo-alone," she whispered, tears soaking my shirt as she broke down in my arms.

I kissed her forehead, "You're not alone. You have me."

-

This chapterrrrrr really hit me in the feels man

I love Ellie so fucking much I can't even sosnalxiqlba

I wrote part of this at school hah

Anyways, hi hello! How have you guys been :)

I need to do homework so I'll stop and not ramble

I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter

I love you guys so so much!!

Until next update my sunshines :D

Excuse any mistakes I made

Byee

~xoxo~

Linda

P.S.
I apologize if updates come a bit slower :(
School started again so yeah
That's all bye guys ilysm xxx