Mean to Me ♡ Larry

1.4

Chapter 14: blade

Present

"Perrie," Harry whispers into the phone. He sits on the ground in the dark, legs pulled to his chest and eyes teary. "Pick up," he sobs and covers his face with his available hand.

It goes to voicemail again. Harry throws the phone to the ground and tries to keep his breathing steady as he glances up at the clock. It is three am, he should be asleep. He was asleep, but a nightmare had woken him, startling him from sleeping again. He never wants to relive that moment again, but the scene haunts him, even to this day.

He makes a stand from the ground and stumbles to the light switch. He looks around his luxurious room and bursts into another fit of tears. He doesn't deserve it, he believes. None of this. He is still the same worthless boy he was back then and no amount of money would change that.

He begins to feel dizzy and sits on the bed, closing his eyes for a moment. But his imagination begins playing tricks on him again, the feeling crawling over his skin and suffocating him. His hands, his mouth. Him.

He needs Perrie. Or Zayn. Or someone, anyone. He can't breathe. Although he promised himself to never do it again, he can't help the thought that crosses his mind. He can't help it as his feet bring him to a stand and carry him to the bathroom.

He opens the drawer and pulls the shiny metal blade out of it. He stares and tries to tell himself he doesn't need it, that he is stronger than that. But he knows it's the only way to bring him back to reality and to get him out of his headspace. The only way to make him feel okay again. The only way to make all the pain and hurt of that day and the countless of others to go away.

And that's exactly what he does, digging the blade into the flesh of his thighs, carving over old words and watching as the blood bulbs out of his already permanently scarred skin.

---

Louis lightly knocks on Harry's office door and pushes it open with his spare hand when he hears the man invite him in.

Harry is hunched over his paper, writing, his hair is messy and he looks tired. He has dark circles under his eyes, casual clothes on and he is frowning deeply. But Louis smiles, in hopes, that maybe Harry will smile back. He makes the effort too, but once again it turns into a frown.

Louis anxiously sets the coffee down, what if Harry knows who he is?... "Hi," Louis squeaks out as Harry sits up a little more, yawning as he rubs his palms over his face.

"Hey, Lou... Thank you," Harry mumbles, taking the warm coffee into his hand and having a sip. He pushes out of his office chair and makes a move over to one of the filing cabinets, flicking through the folders.

Louis can't help but admire the taller man. He is wearing a floral shirt paired with white, ripped jeans and a a pair of vans. Louis' tongue darts out to wetten his lips as his eyes remain on Harry, his heart beating faster.

Harry turns around and passes Louis some sheets of paper. "Could you get these photocopied for me, please? I'd do them, but I am not feeling well today."

Louis nods quickly and gives Harry a smile. "Is there anything else I can do?"

Harry just shrugs and gives him a small smile in return. "I don't think so... But thank you."

"No problem!" Louis turns around and stops in his tracks, turning back towards Harry. "Are you okay?... You have, uh, blood on your jeans."

Harry quickly looks down and slaps his hand over the blood seeping through the white material. He looks up at Louis, eyes wide. "Oh. I scratched my leg last night... Must be that opened up again."

"Ah! Okay," Louis' face contorts into one of sympathy. "I have bandaids if you need one!" Louis blushes and continues. "They do have Woody and Buzz on them though..."

Harry chuckles and looks down embarrassed. "I'll be fine, Lou... I'll just get cleaned up." Harry lets out a shaky breath and looks up under his eyelashes at Louis. "I'm glad I chose you to be my assistant."

Louis let's out a breathy chuckle and smiles as he begins to walk out, his eyes remaining on Harry. "Who else would offer you Toy Story band-aides, hey?"

"Exactly!"

A/N: Let me know your thoughts! Leave me some comments, please! X