Money Power Glory [Mafia Kylo Ren AU]

Ch.14 - Three Things

A/N: sorry for the angst I caused in the last chapter. But if you thought Y/N wasn't gonna handle this like a bad bitch, you were mistaken!

You weren't sure how long you had sat on the floor of your shower that night. For a good chunk of time, you hadn't even had the water on. You just sat there, shivering. You felt numb.

    You had gone through so many emotions in the timespan of only two days. You were exhausted and humiliated. Mostly, you were disappointed in yourself. Not only for letting yourself put your guard down around Kylo but also for even putting yourself into that position in the first place.

    Before he had moved back, you had been so proud of yourself for how protected you were in your relationships. You didn't have real friends, you weren't really in love, you didn't have a family. It got lonely at times, sure, but you knew you were safe from being hurt. You had always prided yourself on ruling your own life.

    Then Kylo showed up seemingly out of nowhere and turned your entire world onto its axis.

    When you finally got out of the shower and looked at yourself in your fogged up bathroom mirror, you frowned. You looked liked shit. You had been crying for days now and you needed real sleep. You couldn't remember the last time you had felt this weak, you absolutely hated it. Getting in closer to the mirror, you realized something.

    You had been so strong for way too long to let someone force themselves into your life and break you down like this.

    The pit of sadness in your stomach slowly dissolved into anger as you took in the dark circles under your eyes. You hated him. How dare he manipulate you and make you feel like this? You were just a game to him, a pawn in his climb to the top and you had let him use you. You exhaled in bitterness.

    There was no way you were going to let him know how much he had messed you up.

    If Kylo wanted to treat you like a bitch, that was fine.

    You could be a bitch. But he wasn't going to like it.

    When Hux got back into town the next day, you had felt like he was a stranger. After everything you'd been through on your own without him, it was like you barely knew him now. And you two weren't exactly close in the first place so that was really saying something.

Hux himself had been acting different too. It was little things that you noticed. He was more confident, cocky almost. He talked about the future a lot, how he had so much planned. His trip with Snoke must've went well, you assumed.

    The night he got back in town, you two had gotten food and watched that movie you wanted to see, just like you had planned. When he had wrapped an arm around you and started kissing you deeply, you had the urge to run away. You knew where he wanted this to go and all you could think about was the marks on your legs.

    Somehow, you had been lucky enough to convince him you had a headache and needed to have sex with all of the lights off.

    Having sex with Hux was a lot different than having sex with Kylo. You hated to admit to yourself how disappointing that it was.

    It wasn't that sex with Hux was bad, necessarily. In fact, you had gone your entire relationship with him thinking that it was great. But the passion you felt with Kylo and the way that he knew just how to touch you and exactly how you needed it...it couldn't compare.

    You had spent the entire time, staring off into the darkness, hoping he would finish quickly so that you could go into the bathroom let out the tears that were threatening to fall from your eyes. Kylo really fucked you up and it pissed you off.