the girl with all of the choices

t h i r t y - f o u r

4813 words

december twenty-fifth- Christmas Day

Christmas.

Gifts under the tree.

Laughs shared with family and friends.

Drop scones for breakfast.

It's Christmas. 

I opened my eyes and saw my favourite Slytherin on the pillow next to me. His hair was tousled, his eyes closed, and his mouth ever so slightly open. He would have looked absolutely ridiculous if he were anybody else. But he was him. And Merlin, he was perfect. 

Quickly, thoughts came racing back into my head about our talks from last night. All of the bad things threatening to tear us apart; my blood status, his parents, our feelings for one another, You-Know-Who himself would probably even make the list. 

"Did I do something wrong?" /  "I can't." /  "I would be betraying my family." /  "If I did this, it would be inescapable. It would be too real."

Don't think about that, Addie. He said he cares about you. Think about the good things. 

I blinked my eyes a few times to try to clear my thoughts. Then, I realized my hand was intertwined with his. Had we slept that way all night? If we could make it through the night with our hands still together, maybe we could make it out of Hogwarts together too.

I looked back over at him. His face was scrunched into a scowl, his usual resting form. Just seeing him reminded me of how much I love him. 

The goofy dancing, both last night and the night before. The way he looked in my jumper. The way he talked with my cousins like he knew them. The way he looked so comfortable walking around London with me. The way he thought he wasn't enough for me. The way he helped to heal my hand after detention. The way he played Quidditch as if it were the only thing he truly cared about. The way his eyes glimmered in the moonlight. The way he always made sure I was okay. His letters. His natural intelligence when it came to almost anything. The Astronomy Tower. Him.

And like magic or love, all of the worries washed away. It was Christmas morning, and I was in bed next to him. And once he woke up, we would go out to the sitting room and give each other our gifts. And then, Dad and I would make drop scones, and we'd have a wonderful breakfast before Aunt Olivia and Grandmother arrived. And then we'd do it all over again. 

And it would just be us. 

I knew if I stayed any longer in my room, my thoughts would begin to circle the drain once again. I slowly pulled my hand from his, stopping once he got restless. Eventually, my hand was free from his and I snuck out of bed, leaving my Slytherin Prince to his slumbers.

I walked out of my room, closing the door behind me gently as to not make any noise. I walked out to the kitchen, determined to make some coffee. After I grabbed my coffee, I made my way back to the sofa, sitting in my usual spot. 

I looked around at the room and was instantly reminded of last Christmas. Waking up early, seeing all of our gifts under the tree, sitting with Cedric before everyone woke up...

Cedric. 

I miss you. So much has happened. I wish you were here so I could tell you all about it.