the girl with all of the choices

s e v e n t y - t w o

5272 words

march first- missed targets

~ Addison ~

Draco hadn't been in Potions yesterday.

At first, I was concerned. Theo didn't seem put off by it, though, so I didn't think too much about it. He was probably just doing something for his task. What though, I could not say. 

I tried to inconspicuously ask Theo about it during class, but he didn't really give me much information. He said he was sick, which I knew was a lie. It just meant that he was busy. 

He and I had been spending a lot of time together, even though he still had to work on the Cabinet. I would lay around in his room while he, Theo, Blaise, and Pansy would read up on it, only getting to contribute a few times. He didn't want me to be involved. I knew why, but it was frustrating. After all, I was the best out of all of them at charms, so they could use my help. But he would only ever let me help when they couldn't figure something out. It was a bit infuriating, but ultimately I caved to his directions, knowing that he did know slightly better than me considering he was the one involved with the Dark Lord.

I was doing better. 

After that night in his dormitory with the goblets, I knew how to get my anger out. He would bring me down there whenever I seemed out of it and give me something to break. Goblets, mirrors, papers to rip up, and a whole slew of other random things that could be ruined in one way or another. 

He was angry too, but he never really showed me. Not physically, at least. He would get secluded for days at a time, not leaving his room other than for classes. I would always try to go down and stay with him when he was like that, but he would push me away. He would drink and yell, a lot, especially when his plans went awry or the Cabinet did not work as it was supposed to. He would say things I knew he didn't mean, taking all of his issues out on me. He never hit me, but he would use me as his own verbal punching bag.  It was frustrating, but we all had ways of expressing ourselves. 

All of us had different ways of expressing ourselves. My knowledge of the other Slytherins was increasing as well, especially in this area of expertise.

Theo would get high and be mean. 

[january twenty-sixth]- I was walking down the hall towards their room, eager to spend another afternoon with my Slytherin, even if it just meant sitting on his bed while he and Theo researched. Or even worse, if it meant I would have to endure Pansy's nonsensical remarks.

"Ferret."

I opened the door without thinking, knowing that there wasn't anything to hide now that I knew the extent of their plans. Usually, I would knock, but I had been spending so much time down there that I was practically their fourth roommate.

I wished I had knocked.

Theo was laying on his bed, his head flopped over the side so that it was upside down. Draco was standing over him, glaring down at him with such dismay that, for a moment, I was genuinely concerned for Theo's well being.

"I already told you, mate. I have no fucking idea why the bird died. Why don't you just bugger off and go wank or something? That'll make you feel better," Theo suggested sarcastically before his eyes met mine. "Let me amend my former statement. Your Puff is here, so she could wank for you. Or you could just fuck. Either way, release the tension."

Draco turned to me with a questioning look. "What are you doing here?"

"Just came to see you, that's all. What's up with Theo?"