the girl with all of the choices

n i n e t y - s e v e n

8284 words

october eleventh- the army is resurrected

~ Addison ~

Merlin, or God, or whoever it was who ruled the universe seemed to have a soft spot for me after almost sentencing me to death. Maybe they were trying to make up for it.

Allowing me the pleasure of waking up before my Slytherin was the exact gift to give to try to make it up to me. I had considered it practically a part of my daily routine at this point. 

This past week, he had to go to a few classes, but he and Fawn had figured it out with Professors Slughorn and Sprout so that I wouldn't be left alone. They would both stay up here for lunch and update each other on how I was doing as if I was no longer sentient. Theo had joined us three times the past week while Ainsley and Pansy had joined us once. 

They were all, miraculously, beginning to get along. They appeased my old requests and called each other by their given names. There would be quips here and there, but for the most part, they were civil. Friendly, even. 

Who knew it would take a near-death experience for them to all get along?

I hated that Draco had to leave, but I knew it was good for him. When he returned after going with Theo and Blaise last week, he was a whole different person. At first, he was solemn, prompting me to wonder if something had happened or if he had succumbed to the self-loathing that leaving me would bring. But then, he started with his sarcastic comments and lazy kisses and he was the same Draco he had been before everything went south.

However, even when he did have to wake up for a morning class, fate, or Merlin, or God, or my subconscious, whatever greater power it was made sure I was awake at least 10 minutes before him. 

It was the only time I ever really got to think and be grateful. Of course, being grateful didn't always equate to good feelings. 

That was my dilemma this Saturday morning.

Later today, we were supposed to have our first DA meeting. Ginny, Neville, and Luna were going to be here at 11:45 to talk about things before everyone started to show up. 

Mornings with my Slytherin were my favourite, but this one would have to be cut short. He had subdued his qualms over the course of the past seven days and had come to accept that this would be good, especially for me.

I would have something to do again. I would be able to play a part, no matter how small, in making the world better in spite of the war. If I could make sure that no more people had to endure detention with the Carrows or teach someone a spell that could save their life, I would be fulfilled. It would all be worth it.

His hair was just as messy as it always was, his skin alabaster in the morning sun. The Sectumsempra scars on his chest were pink, still healing even though the incident was months ago. 

He was perfect.

I, on the other hand, was less than.

The prospect of starting up the DA again, of the war, returning and infecting the small haven we had created, where nothing mattered other than my morning potions regimen and our arms around each other, that was terrifying.

It all meant that everything would probably get bad again. I mean, we were at war. Anything could happen. He could be torn from me at any moment.

We could be broken all over again.

It was absolutely appalling.

I was so grateful for him. He was not only the love of my life but the reason that I had managed to keep going. I would have begged Fawn two weeks ago to let me give up if it was only her here, if I didn't have him. It was the hardest thing I had ever done, but it was all worth it for him.