the girl with all of the choices

f o r t y - s i x

**TW: Mentions of Suicide**

4473 words

july fifth- forgiveness

~ Draco ~

It had been a week since we left school. I wish I never came home. 

Home. You don't have a home. It's just a house that you live in.

Right.

I had spent most of the past week in my room. When I wasn't with Addie, of course. I had apparated to see her three times. We were getting better. I could tell she was starting to trust me again.

But I would always come home. And I would always be met with the unforgiving face of my Aunt. Mum would always stay in her room during the day, only emerging for dinner, which left me with zero company except that of Aunt Bellatrix. 

Merlin was she interesting. 

I didn't really know what to expect of her. She was a murderer, for one thing. She had been in Azkaban for my entire life minus the first 13 months. She worshipped You-Know-Who like he was her one undying love or something disgustingly similar. 

I guess, because of this, I expected her to be sinister? Uncaring? Cold?

She was the complete opposite. She was the warmest person that had ever graced the space between the walls of the Manor. She made the most inappropriate jokes at the most unusual times. It was as if she were still 18, just stuck in her 45-year-old body. She would have the house-elves cook the craziest meals in the middle of the night just because she could. She'd lounge around like she owned the place. 

The most unexpected thing was that I took comfort in her. 

Mum hadn't been around much this past week, and it was nice to have a similar presence to the one she would provide. Aunt Bella seemed to actually care about me, always asking if I had eaten and ordering the elves to make food for me if I hadn't. It revealed just how similar they were. I mean, they were sisters, so it made sense for them to be similar. But everything about them was similar, right down to the way they held their forks. 

It was strange to have such a lively presence in this dead house. 

Very interesting, to say the least. 

Dinners were even more unusual. When father was home, he would sit at the head of the table. Mum and I would sit on either side of him so that we were facing each other. But now, that chair was always empty. Mum didn't dare to take it. Aunt Bella brought up a seat next to Mum while I stayed in my spot. I didn't want to take his seat either. I was still a kid. If I took that seat, I would be the new head of the family. I didn't want to have to be the man of the house.

But I suppose I already was. I mean, there was nobody else here to challenge me for it. 

I had a terrible feeling I'd have to take that seat soon. 

Until I had to, I would relish the oasis of my childhood seat. And that would have to do. 

Today was the day of father's trial. Aunt Bella couldn't go, for obvious reasons, so it would just be Mum and me.