the girl with all of the choices

s i x t y - t w o

5952 words

november twenty-seventh- coniungere tenebris

~ Addison ~

Potions is hard.

School is hard.

My older friends always told me how challenging NEWT Classes were, but I never truly believed them. 

I should have. 

I had been drowning in work ever since Slughorn's dinner party. The worst part was, now I had to start thinking ahead because we only had a month left of the term until the holidays. 

Christmas was coming. And I had no idea what that would mean for us.

Draco and I had been getting better, slowly. We had been spending more time together since our Hogsmeade date on the day Katie Bell was cursed, even more since that night we spent in the Room of Requirement. We weren't good, though. He was still busy all the time, but he would find places in his day where we could meet and catch up. He was still falling behind in his studies, never doing all of his work. 

I had asked Theo about him a few times, to which he always responded that he didn't know, or he wasn't sure. I had a feeling he knew something I didn't, but he would always deny that, and say that he just didn't know what was wrong. 

It was extremely frustrating. 

We were in Potions this afternoon, preparing to brew a draught of Dreamless Sleep Potion. 

Draco seemed as if he could use a vial of it. His hair wasn't neat as it always was, and his tie wasn't fastened as tightly. Whatever his family responsibilities were seemed to literally be keeping him up all night. He had dark circles under his eyes, making him seem paler than usual. 

"Are you alright?" I asked him quietly while other students continued to arrive.

"What do you mean?" he asked, his voice monotone as he flipped through the pages of his textbook.

"Your hair is a mess."

His eyes shot up to meet mine. "It is?" He quickly lifted his hands to his hair and tried to comb it down with his fingers, obviously distraught at his realization of his current state.

"Let me fix it," I said, closing the space between us so that I could properly adjust his blond locks. 

I expected him to push me away, to want to distance himself from me considering we were around other people who didn't know we were together. But he didn't.

I attributed that to his fatigue as well.

"Have you been sleeping?" I questioned him, my voice timid and hushed as my fingers worked.

"I've been busy."

"You said you were prioritizing things. You need to make sure that your well-being is at the top of that list. You look awful."

"Gee, thanks."

"I didn't mean it like that. It's just... I'm worried about you, Draco."

"I'm fine," he dismissed my words, shaking his head.

"Don't lie to me like that when there's no reason to. It's okay to not be fine, to ask for help when you need it. It won't make you weak-"

"I said I'm fine. I promise you."

Our eyes locked again for a moment, his intense and sure, mine worried and apprehensive. 

"Alright class, please take your places at your brewing stations," Slughorn instructed, prompting Draco to break from my gaze and move to his spot. I did the same, but I hesitated a moment longer, a part of me desperate for him to not listen to our Professor, to stay with me for just a few more seconds, to actually cement that he was okay.