» Time Is Dancing « | » Carl Grimes «

» SAY THE WORD «

Screaming And Shouting

I decided I hate the sound of babies crying. I wasn't sure if it was just because of what had happened today, but the noise just seemed to cut through me in the most unpleasant way. I blocked it out, ignoring the surrounding sounds and focusing on the ringing in my ears.

That was, until Daryl came over to me. "I'm going on a run. Baby formula, clothes, whatever. Hey, you okay?"

That was a good question. I think a better question would've been 'Are you gonna be okay?' I could confidently answer that with a straight answer. Yes, I would be okay. Right now, I felt like crawling into a hole and sleeping until I died. But I bet I wasn't the only one.

I just nodded my head and avoided his gaze. He didn't seem satisfied with my answer but I knew he had bigger things to worry about. He took Maggie with him, needing to be quick about it. That baby wouldn't survive long.

There wasn't a lot we could do except wait. Hershel had been keeping an eye on the baby, examining it the best he could. I felt so helpless. I knew I should've been helping him, checking the baby's health and learning what I could, but I felt like my mind couldn't take anything in today. I walked straight past them at the table and took the stairs slowly, stopping outside my cell. I knew Carl was next door on his bed. I didn't want to leave him alone in a time like this. He didn't even look up when I walked in, or when I sat beside him, our backs against the wall. I wasn't even sure if he knew I was there. I debated internally what to do next, deciding the best course of action was comfort. When something bad like this happens, a soft hand can provide a bit of light. So I reached out and took his hand in mine gently, careful not to hold it too tightly.

"It's a girl." He finally muttered.

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We were all worried about Rick. The death of his wife would have a terrible effect on him, we knew that, but I hadn't expected him to be so violent. He was in the boiler room, the place where Lori died, taking out walker after walker. When Glenn checked up on him, he pinned him to the wall, the aggressive gleam not letting up for a second.

Carl held the baby. She screamed and cried, probably starving. She was already in so much pain after only being born a few hours ago. Carl's gentle rocks soothed her, causing her to stare into his eyes in wonder. She was a beautiful baby. Everything about her was so pure. Her wide sparkling eyes and tiny nose, the soft downy hair on her head. Her little fingers clasped and unclasped in the air, peeking out from the blanket she was wrapped in. Just looking at her made me feel lighter. As if, even in our losses, something new had been born.

Maggie and Daryl came back a few hours later, riding through the gate. "How's she doing?" Daryl carefully took the baby out of Carl's arms. Who knew he could be so gentle. He shushed her cries, patting her back soothingly. He stared down at the baby with the softest expression, the caring gleam never leaving his eyes.

He smiled widely as he fed her the bottle, her squeals diminishing completely. The gray walls and steel bars felt a little brighter today.

"You like that?" He whispered to the baby, "Little ass-kicker?"

The bubble of laughter echoed around the room, coming from all the members of our group.

I just wished Rick was here.

»« »« »« »«

I couldn't sleep that night. The baby was quiet, and the walkers along the fence were far enough away that their growls were unheard of. It was my thoughts that made the most noise.

It started when I went back to my cell, getting ready for bed and reaching over to untuck the quilt. Sophia's doll. The black button eyes stared right into my soul. They could see the guilt I felt, the sadness inside me. I made a promise at Sophia's grave that I would look out for her mom, and I couldn't do that in the end. I had been gripping the doll in my hands all night, deep in thought. I didn't see Daryl on the perch, staring at my cell. I supposed from where I was sitting on the floor, and where he was sitting on the steps, there wasn't anything blocking the view. I should consider putting a sheet up.

"Hey. What're you doing still awake?" Daryl asked me softly. I think taking care of that baby all night brought out a different side of him. Like he was letting himself care about people now. He stood from his seat and joined me on the floor, taking the doll out my hands when I didn't reply.

"This Sophia's?" I nodded my head at his question.

"I just...I promised her I would look out for Carol, you know? I couldn't even do that." I sighed.

He put the doll on my bed and said, "That ain't your fault. Carol dying had nothing to do with you. 'Sides, she's with her kid now."

I nodded my head and wiped my eyes. "I'm sorry. I know you were close."

"She was tough. She didn't stop fighting." He agreed. "You doing okay?"

I pondered the question. "Yeah, I think I am. It's just been a long day." I smiled slightly.

»« »« »« »«

Fairly short but I like to mix up the chapter length

Season four spoilers below

I just finished writing the chapter where Hershel dies and it's so tragic coming back to publish season three where he's still alive