Rahi Lascivus

Chapter 33

Rahi

"Kumusta? Are you feeling better now?" Tanong ni Yoj sa akin nang magkita kami sa classroom.

"Aligaga ka Rahi." Komento ni Luci.

"Paanong hindi? Marceline told me she loves me." Sabi ko ng mahina.

"What?!" Si Xeah.

"Ano?!" Si Luci.

"Hmmm." Sino pa ba? Edi si Yoj na parang ewan.

Napatingin sa amin ang ibang classmates namin dahil sa biglaang pagsigaw ng dalawa. Buti nalang hindi pa nagsisimula ang first period this morning.

"Anong sinabi mo? Mag kwento ka dali!" Xeah seems so excited.

"I didn't say anything."

Napatampal sa noo si Luci.

Si Yoj naman napailing.

Anong gusto nilang sabihin ko? Hindi nga ako mapakali kaninang umaga dahil sa hindi ko alam kung anong pakikitungo ang nais kong ipakita.

"Lunch time. Rooftop."

Ang sabi ni Yoj at timing naman na pumasok na ang teacher sa first period.

* * * * *

Sobrang pigil ng inis ko dahil nagpakita si Yssa dito. Ano na naman bang kailangan nila at pati si Yssa pinapapunta nila dito?

Hindi ko gusto ang sinabi niyang ginagamit ko lang si Marceline. What I feel for her is genuine.

"Yssa came, huh. Tiyak magtatanong na din si Marceline kung sino si Issabel." Panimula ni Yoj. Hindi ko din gusto ang pinakita ni Marceline na agarang pagtalikod sa'kin kanina.

She's not like that. Kung may tanong man sa isipan niya, she'll ask head on. Direct kung direct magsalita.

"You should make your feelings clear Rahi. Paano kung mawala si Marceline sa'yo. Hindi ka ba natatakot?" Sabi ni Xeah. Buhat sa sinabi ay napaisip ako. Handa ba akong mawala siya? Marami pa akong pinoproblema, dumagdag pa 'to.

Sumasakit ang ulo ko sa kakaisip kung paano haharapin ang lahat ng 'to.

"Hindi naman basta bastang nawala 'yung feelings ko sa kanya. It's just that..."

"She broke your heart and you're scared to end up like your Mama." Continue ni Luci sa sasabihin ko.

Narinig kong napabuntong hininga silang tatlo.

"My mama loved Rohan that damn much. And look where it brought her."

"Ang sabi mo, mahal ka ni Marceline. You're stopping yourself for falling deeper with her, Rahi. And that's because you saw how your mother struggle with love."
Sabi ni Luci, napatingin ako sa kanya.

"The best way to deal with your personal matter with Marceline, is you should deal with your personal life first."

"Yoj is right, Rahi. Whatever lapses your father made, even though personally we hate him too, you two should talk."
Sabi ni Xeah.

"There's nothing to talk about. I've despised them my entire life. Hell, I really don't care about them."

"Why do you still carry their name, then? You could have asked us to change that."

"It's a constant reminder. I was born with their blood, grow up with their name, I wanted to remind myself to abhor them until I die." I spat the words like poison. They're the reason kung bakit naghirap si Mama.

"You said you still have feelings for Marceline. But what if she get tired and left? Sa mga pinapakita mo sa kanya, the way you're treating her, you're pushing her away."