Rahi Lascivus

Chapter 12

Rahi

Sa totoo lang? Hindi ko alam ang nararamdaman ko ngayon. I've got confused. To what Marceline is doing to me, leaving me wanting something from her. And to things I wanted to do for Shu, for us.

Wala kaming ibang maaasahan ni Shu kundi kaming dalawa lang. My friends and their family are there, sure point taken. But to whatever angle I'm looking at, I still needed and will have to stand up on my own feet to raise my brother.

But, Marceline is doing such a fine thing that even I couldn't resist. Naknangpucha naman oh! Ba't ba sobrang pinagmalupitan yata ako ng mundo? Or maybe I'm just confusing things when it should be just simple.

I'll entertain Marceline's feelings and work hard for Shu and I's future. Simple as that!

But why am I complicating things right now?!

Baka kasi naitanim mo na sa kukote mo na pinaglalaruan ka lang ni Marceline.

Probably. I can't say for sure na seryoso talaga siya. Come to think of it, we started as two people bickering. Ay hindi pala, inaaway niya ako dahil sa mga lecheng issues at pictures na kumakalat sa campus. And now, here she is! Mukhang maamong tupa na nagpapakita ng motibo para sa'kin.

Ugh! I really don't know! Maybe I'm exaggerating things.

"Oh, napano ka at para kang pinagbagsakan ng langit at lupa?" Tanong ni Luci, napatingala ako sa kanya.

"Something bothering you, Rahi? Tell us, maybe we could help. Is it about work?" Nag-aalalang Yoj naman ang nakatungo sa'kin ngayon.

"Or something just happened last weekend. Who knows?" May himig na panunuksong sabi ni Xeah.

I stared at them, they all looked at with worried faces. "Ano?"

"Xeah is right." I heaved a sigh.

"Ha! I knew it!" Xeah snapped her fingers like she just have a eureka moment.

"Spill!" Luci sat down next to me, making me scoot over.

"Hindi ko alam kung anong gagawin ko. Marceline is confusing me."

"In what way she's confusing you, Rahi?" Yoj asked.

So, sinabi ko sa kanila ang lahat lahat. Walang naiwan na kwento. Detailed na detailed talaga, kahit na panay ang tukso nila sa'kin dahil ako ang first kiss ni Marceline.

"So, basically she's doing this because of her family's mantra?" Yoj asked.

"That's the only thing I could think of. Not because she liked me or something." Sagot ko. Napaisip naman siya.

"Who cares! At least you got to date the hottest chick in our campus!" Luci cheered.

"Hindi siya manok Luci." She rolled her eyes at me.

I glanced at Xeah, noticing she's not really saying anything right now. At least, not yet. "How about you Xeah? What can you say about this?" Yoj asked her.

Hinawakan niya ang baba niya gamit ang kanang kamay, tila nag-iisip ng malalim.
"I think you need to go for it. Marceline didn't think twice about going after you right after that kiss."

Nasapo ko ang mukha ko. Gulong gulo ako eh. "You know what, ang gusto ko lang talaga noong una ay inisin ka niya. She did get in your nerves. Because I wanted you to feel and do things that a high school student should do, Rahi."

I raised my eyes at Xeah after she said that.
"I appreciate your concern Xeah. But I'm enjoying my life as it is right now."

"No, you're not!" Nasapo ni Xeah ang noo. "Look, what I meant is you should be enjoying your teenage life. Liking someone, having a girlfriend or maybe fall in love. I don't care. But you're still too engrossed about running after the future na sobrang layo pa Rahi! Ang bata bata mo pa. You still have greater days ahead of you."