The Thin Line Between Love and Hate

61

Dear Diary,

This is Shuhua speaking, or well, writing. 

It's february 10. 2019; It's 13:37, the sky is clean and the snow is long gone, it would be the perfect day if you ask me, to spend a day in the park would be a must, but far away from the lakes as I'm still nervous around water. I should probably see someone to deal with that in the future.

To whoever is reading this, which I hope is just my own self somewhere in the future or just Yuqi being nosy again, this is a brand new diary as my previous one was stolen… and if you're one of my future children, It's a long story, I'll explain one day when you can hear about it without hating me; This diary has two locks so good luck trying to pry it open, sucker! 

Unless you're my mom, in this case you shouldn't be reading my diary mom! Please put it back where you found it.

A lot of things have changed this year, more than I expected and liked. Minnie Unnie, who's a constant presence not only in this diary but in the old one too, decided to become a lawyer once she graduates. Can you believe that? I bet my dad would love to hear about it, I’ll make sure to tell him once we meet.

Soyeon has decided to become a teacher, and I must confess I never saw it coming but who am I to judge? She seemed sure that that's what she wanted when I talked with Minnie about it. I hope she'll be happy about that choice and I know Yuqi hopes for the same as well, even now; I don’t know much of what Miyeon wanna do after she graduates, according to Minnie she doesn’t talk much about it for now, so she’s probably still figuring it all. That's all.

She has time. 

Ah, yeah. Of course. How can I leave out Soojin, am I right? Well, how do I start with this? Well, she still wants to be a dancer and wants to pursue that career and I’m glad to hear about that. I know she’ll be a great dancer like the type lots of companies will try to get to choreograph for them, she has talent and potential. 

She also broke up with me. 

She couldn’t trust me the same way she did before and honestly? I saw that coming. I broke the trust she had in me by lying when I didn’t have to, when I shouldn’t have to; She was fine waiting for my time to tell her about the person I loved before, she was fine with not knowing. She told me that herself so in the end I lied for nothing, I wanted to ease her worries only to end up breaking her heart and now I lost her for good. 

and it’s all my fault, always thinking I could always get everything I want by doing things my own way without thinking about others, or how I could hurt Soojin the moment I decided to lie to her. I just hope....

I hope she’ll forgive me someday.

“Shu” She looked up to Yuqi who just motioned forward. “It’s our flight now” She said before looking at the diary in her hand. “Another diary?” She asked, watching as the younger stood up, grabbing her luggage and looked at the other.

“Yeah” Shuhua replied, ignoring the way Yuqi frowned. “What? I need to write down my feelings”

“Do it on your phone like someone from the 21 century” The older said as they started to walk away, Shuhua rolled her eyes at the comment but didn’t reply. “It’s bad enough what happened before-”