The Sweet Silver Song || An Ashton Irwin fanfiction

Fifteen.

"I'm supposed to receive my price in two weeks... You know like give a little speech, shake hands and meet people" I murmured; my eyes fixed on my fingers as they were wrapped around my glass.

"Oh my god; I don't even know how you're going to get out of this situation!" Linda exclaimed and I let out a small chuckle before lifting my head to look at my two friends in front of me.

Linda; Greg and I were sat at a table; enjoying a drink as I decided to drop the bomb and tell them what had been bothering me for the last two days. I was hoping they were going to reassure me, tell me that it was going to be okay; that I should tell Ashton and that he'd understand. But all I got were wide-opened mouths and even wider eyes.

"Thanks for trying to help!" I said sarcastically and the three of us laughed as Greg took one of my hands in his.

"Are you going to tell him?" He asked; the sympathy in his voice was sickening and I felt like throwing up for a second.

"Yes... Of course, yes! He'll find out anyway so I'd rather he finds out by me than by anyone else... I just... I don't know... If it was the other way around; like if he'd written a song saying all those bad things about me; it'd hurt me so much." I explained and tears sprung to my eyes as I imagined the look on his face as I'd tell him. Why did it have to happen now, just when things started to feel normal again?

"Hey it's gonna be fine! Baby, you just gotta tell him the whole story, okay? Tell him exactly when you wrote that text, he knows you were mad so it won't be nothing new to him and just tell him that's not how you generally feel about him and that it was just an in-the-moment kind of feeling and just tell him you love him" Linda said with what I knew was supposed to be a light tone.

My eyebrows furrowed in confusion and I looked at her with pure panic in my eyes as I once again pictured the scene in my head.

"I-I can't do that" I replied, vigorously shaking my head as I looked at her with horror. She made a weird face and looked at me, confused as her lips parted, then closed again before she finally spoke.

"You... Don't you love him?" she asked and it felt like she was judging me. I knew it was because Ashton was my soulmate. Linda and Greg both believed in it like some people believed in God. They were both absolutely convinced that their life would change once they'd meet their soulmates and maybe they were right; mine had changed in a way. But what was sure was that my life hadn't become perfect all of a sudden; it became intense and full of events; that was for sure, but things were everything but perfect.

"I don't know... But what's sure is that if I do, and if I am to tell him; it won't be like that; it won't be just so he forgives me for something I've done!" I tried to explain as I withdrew my hand from Greg's hold and looked at my friends with hope. I just wanted them to understand; I wanted to feel supported.

"That makes sense" Greg admitted and I let out a relieved sigh as I gave him a small smile. I had been so touchy lately; feeling like the whole world was against me; like people were making plans behind my back. All I wanted was for someone to understand how I was feeling without judging me. And I knew I could count on Linda and Greg when it came to that.

"Whenever you decide to talk to him; just know that if it doesn't go too well; we'll be ready to get drunk as fuck with you and just party the night away!" Linda exclaimed as the three of us got up to leave the place. I took them in my arms and thanked them before getting back to my apartment; a small smile on my face. I would never be alone.

I had been avoiding Ashton for six days when he showed up at my front door; beautiful and uninvited. My eyes grew wide for a nanosecond but I forced a big smile on my face to hide my nervousness.