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by CarmenKB

by CarmenKB

"What- what happened?" I ask, grabbing his hand when he had held it out for me to hold.

"I don't really know. It's like you stopped breathing. Like a panic attack without the hyperventilating. And then you kind of just fell. Are you okay? How are you feeling?"

"Dizzy. My chest hurts."

"Do you wanna go home? We're not far."

"No, no. I can make it. I don't want to have to explain to my parents why I'm back."

"Are they mad?"

"I don't really know. I yelled at them before they could really get mad at me."

"You yelled at them?" He gasps, looking at me like I was crazy.

I grab my phone, opening mine and Minho's conversation from yesterday. I show him my first text, explaining how everything went down.

"Shit... I mean, good for you. You don't deserve the shit they make you go through. But wow. I'm just amazed that you did that."

"Yeah."

We stay silent before remembering what we were doing. "We're late, aren't we?"

"Yeah," I sigh, standing up with his help. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean for this to happen."

"It's okay. You couldn't exactly control it. You're going through a lot. Let's just take our time, okay?"

I walk into the classroom, getting a look from the teacher. I give her the late pass that Ms.Im wrote for me. She nods, letting me go sit down.

Minho gives me a worrying look, but I hold up my hand, telling him to wait until after class. He nods, grasping my hand for a quick second before letting me get my stuff out.

"What happened?"

"I think I had an anxiety attack with Changbin while we were on our way here. And then I explained what happened yesterday. We didn't realize how long we were taking."

"Are you okay now? Physically?"

"I think so. I'm just really tired."

"What about mentally?"

I snort, knowing my mental state was not at all in a good place. He just gives me a funny look.

"I mean, I don't want to kill anyone. Isn't that a good thing?"

"I guess?" His lips start to turn upward. He was fighting a smile probably because I wasn't taking this seriously. "Just get to class. We can talk more later. Love you." He pecks my lips, ruffling my hair.

"Hey! Asshole," I grumble, flipping him off before walking into the classroom. I quickly step back out, pulling him over so I could peck his cheek. "Love you, too."

I get back inside, sitting at my usual seat with my painting. Mina was already working on her painting. From what I could see, it was already beautiful. She was an amazing painter.

"That's really pretty," I compliment, watching her steady hand paint a dark purple line over a magenta.

"Thanks," she smiles, glancing over at my own. "You're so talented, what the hell. That's amazing as well, Han. There's definitely something in there. It's a bit sad."

I stare at her, wondering how the hell she could tell. She shrugs it off though, telling me to keep up the good work. If only she knew.

______

•update for this week.
thank you for 100k•