Why So Lonely? || Minsung 1/3 ✔️

90

The rest of the day was like nothing had happened. I couldn't even comprehend most of what happened. The guys were basically taking turns in dragging me around like an emotionless doll.

Today was Friday. I think. Minho told me he would pick me up today - again. I got out of my bed, getting dressed. It was a routine. A stupid fucking routine.

I took in a sharp breath, calming myself down. Today, I felt even more oddly stressed. My heart rate was increasing and my stomach was churning. I ignored it though. It was nothing new anymore.

I jogged down the staircase, kissing my mom goodbye and walking out the door. It was a bit early, but I decided to get some air before Minho came.

I sucked in a lung full of chilly air, feeling my nerves grow instead of settle. I try to shake my hands out, resting them on the back of my neck. When my icy fingertips graze the heated skin, the uneasiness in my stomach began to soothe.

You're fine, Jisung. You're fine. It's okay. You're going to see Minho and it'll be okay.

But for some reason, it doesn't help. As much as I try to convince myself, it doesn't work like it had before. I felt like I had a wall up against myself, not just other people.

A few minutes later, Minho pulled into my driveway. I quickly hopped inside his car, kissing his cheek as a morning greeting.

"Are you feeling okay today?" He questions, not leaving my driveway yet.

I nod, biting my tongue. I could hear my heartbeat in my ears. My hand grasps his tightly as I look out the window.

"Alright. Did you eat?"

I shook my head no.

"Do you wanna grab something before we get to school?"

I shake my head again.

"You know you don't have to go-"

"Just drive, Minho. We don't need to talk about it," I snarl before gasping and covering my mouth with my hand. "I-I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to snap like that."

"It's okay-"

"N-no, it's not, it's not," I cut him off, my breathing beginning to catch in my throat.

My hands moved fast, tugging at the seat belt. My fingers got twisted up in my shirt, and I struggled to get the snake off. It felt like every second I had it on, it was getting tighter and tighter. Finally, I shove my fingers into the buckle latch, releasing myself.

"Jisung, calm down-"

I fling the door open and stumble out, landing on my hands and knees, choking myself to breathe fresh air. I was struggling so much above that I didn't even feel the sharp pains of rocks digging into my palms.

"Jisung!"

His hands were cautious and not panicky, as mine had been. He carefully sets his hand on my shoulder, moving it to my chin and forcing me to look at him.

He must've been shocked to see what my state was because he leaned back to get the entire messy picture. My eyes were wide, full of anxiety and salty tears. My mouth was agape, struggling to breath in steadily. My cheeks were flushed as if I were sick, but it was just because of the pressure being put on my head.

He cups my face, putting our foreheads together and looking me in the eyes. My trembling hands grasp his forearms tightly. "Ji baby, listen to me. It's okay. I know you didn't mean it. Take in a deep breath for me, please. In and out, angel."

I nod, my chest stuttering for a good five minutes before I could actually do as he said. I hiccuped while finishing my breath out, a small pain sizzling in my chest. I grunt softly, leaning into his arms.

"You're staying home today," he demands, worry laced through his voice.