Why So Lonely? || Minsung 1/3 ✔️

27

The rest of school flies by. English and history weren't very exciting. In biology, Hyunjin and I got partnered for another lab project. We would do the project on Friday after taking notes tomorrow. Today was Wednesday so I wasn't worried about doing anything.

My headphone cord hits my neck slightly when I take steps forward on the sidewalk. I was walking home like usual. IZ's All You Want starts playing in my ear buds.

Few cars pass by me; the street I was on was just a normal neighborhood. Houses surrounded me, my own just a bit farther down the street.

Without noticing, my headspace slips into a deeper, more negative one. Memories flood through my pupils, blinding me. Auditory hallucinations fill my ears, deafening me.

I'm not supposed to be alone. But I am.

Shaking the thoughts from my head, I let out a sigh. I pull my phone from my pocket, opening the messaging app.

- - - - -

Texting CB97 Loser

Jisung
hey, are you
busy?

CB97 Loser
do you need me to
come get you?

Jisung
please

CB97 Loser
on my way babe

- - - - -

Calling Ma 🌺

"Hello?"

"Can I go over to Chan's for a bit?"

"Yes. I'll be home late."

"Okay. Love you, bye."

- - - - -

I speed walk to my house, wanting to at least put my bag inside the house. Chan lives about ten minutes away. Sometimes we would meet up at the fast food place on the corner because it was the halfway point between out houses.

I run up the stairs, throwing my bag on my bed. I keep my phone and wallet in my pockets. I hear a beep coming from outside, and I rush to leave the empty house.

"Hey," I say, climbing into his car.

"Are you okay?" He questions, turning around to back out of my driveway.

"Yeah, I just missed you."

"Oh shut up, we just saw each other. What's up? Did something else happen?"

"No, I just needed to see you. I didn't want to be alone anymore, and you're the best company that understands what's happening. I love the other guys, but you already know everything."

"Ah, okay. Do you want to go get something to eat? Or just back to my apartment?"

"Apartment, please."

-

"Have you had your eye on anyone?" I question, sitting on his couch.

"Jisung, you know-"

"I know that you like Jeongin. Obviously. You're just too scared to commit to a stupid high school relationship. And you don't think he likes you back even though he literally stares at you and talks about you all the time."

"Jisung, I have work. I have to pay off my apartment. I have school. I don't have time for a relationship," he huffs.

"Fine. I'll work with Jeongin then."

"Oh no you won't. Do not tell him that I like him."

"I won't. I have my ways of other things."

"You and your 'other things.'"

"Chan, you need to live a little," I reply, "working day and night is not living. It's surviving."