46

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by CarmenKB

by CarmenKB

It was a few hours after Parasite had ended. We all were quite exhausted, playing games and all. Chan's apartment was pretty getting a bit stuffy, so the Changlix couple and Minho and I decided to go home while the others slept.

We decided to go back to my house since my parents weren't home. Sometimes they just disappear without warning.

Minho wraps his arms around my waist, pulling me closer to his chest.

"Hm, you're so warm," I say, snuggling closely to him. "You're like a fluffy kitty."

"Pft, first time I've ever heard that."

Before I could put on the clean shirt, I feel his hands on me. God, were they cold. My skin tingled everywhere he touched, but it felt wrong for some reason.

"Min," I sighed, "go change."

"You're no fun, baby boy."

baby boy?

That wasn't his voice. That's not- that's not my Minho. My breathing picked up; I could feel my heart pounding. Why is it pounding so hard? Why could I feel it?

"Stop," I choked out.

I tried to say more, but my voice was caught. It was so sudden that I forgot how to breathe. I tried lifting my chest. I tried breathing in air.

But I couldn't.

"Baby..."

I shouted as I sat up, breathing heavily. My heart was pounding so intensely against my chest that it hurt, but it wasn't a fast heart beat. It was ever so slow.

"Angel, are you okay?" Minho sits up, grasping my bicep.

I took in deep breaths, reaching to my lamp. Light filled the room, reminding me that I wasn't alone. Minho was actually here.

I nod to Minho's question, trying to calm my breathing along with my heart rate. It took a minute before deciding to cooperate.

"What happened? Nightmare?"

"Y-yeah," I responded, squeezing my blanket's material in my fists.

"Do you-"

"No, let's just go back to bed. I'm sorry," I say, placing myself down on the pillow.

My eyes meet his. They were worried and shocked at the duality of me.

"Are you sure?" He raises a brow, letting his arm wrap around me as it had before.

"Mhm. I always have ones like these. It's okay. I just needed to calm down," I reply, reassuring him that it was fine.

It really was. Though I don't normally have nightmares when I'm sleeping around people, it's happened before.

But the actual heart racing hasn't happened before. I've never woken up to barely being able to breathe. I've woken up screaming, crying, and even puking. Not to a pounding heart and strangled breathing.

My nightmares were getting worse. More frequent. They weren't going away around people, not even Minho who held me at night. Maybe I should see a doctor. I don't know. I'm probably just being dramatic.

Why did the dream feel so real? Of course, they always felt real. But I could feel how hard my heart was hitting my chest. It was like my brain wanted to show me how weak I was.

Every time I spoke up, I wasn't able to breathe. I would choke on my words. I couldn't tell him 'no' even if I wanted to. I was weak.