Why So Lonely? || Minsung 1/3 ✔️

29

After school, I made my way home as usual. Ear buds in, hands in pockets, and trying to keep my mind off of how heavy my backpack felt.

I was beyond stressed. That math test hadn't gone well, and to make it worse, I got homework packets for the rest of my classes besides art and English (I would have rather gotten a packet for English than biology).

I took in deep breaths, reaching my house and unlocking the door. My eyes felt as if someone was physically pulling on them. With the recent stress, I wasn't sleeping well. I hadn't noticed it much since I had other stuff going on.

I needed a break. I could feel the pressure on my shoulders build, and I hated it. I had constant headaches, trouble sleeping, and anxiety that made my skin itch.

I trudged up my stairs, throwing my bag to the corner of my room. My bed was messily made, but I didn't care. I flopped onto it, feeling the lump in my throat grow.

One by one, the tears fell. I just wanted to breathe. I wanted everything to be okay, but it wouldn't be for a long time. At least that's what I believed.

-

I woke up with staggered breathing. A nightmare in the middle of the evening. Fun. For some reason, I was scared out of my mind. I quickly messaged Minho, needing reassurance.

- - - - -

Texting Minhoe 🥰💕

Jisung
i'm scared

Minhoe 🥰💕
why?
is everything okay?

Jisung
yeah, i just had a
really bad nightmare.
it shook me up a bit.

Minhoe 🥰💕
oh angel
do you want me to
come over?

Jisung
if you're not busy
then please

Minhoe 🥰💕
i'm on my way then.
see you in ten

- - - - -

I sat on my bed, thinking over my horrid dream. In reality, it wasn't actually that bad. I wasn't sure why I was even scared. Nothing scary really happened.

Ten minutes pass by and I hear a knock on the front door. Quickly, I jog down the stairs and open the door. As soon as I see him, my lip starts quivering, and tears build in my eyes for the third time today.

He steps forward in a swift motion, pulling me into a hug. I cry into his shoulder, not really sure why I was even crying.

"I-I just, I had a r-really bad nightmare," I explain, "it wasn't even that bad. I don't know why I'm crying. I could just feel the panic within the dream. I could feel it. I remember turning on the bath water and my phone being at 12%, so I plugged it in next to the tub. I remember realizing that I wanted to put bubbles in the tub, so I drained the water and put in this pink liquid. I don't know why I was scared, I just was."

He waddles us over to the couch, sitting me on his lap while still hugging. He begins to speak to me in a soft voice, sympathy clearly twisted in his tone.

"I used to have nightmares, too. I know where your coming from. Are you stressed or anything, baby?"

I nod, "I'm really stressed, but nightmares are a usual occurrence. I have one almost every week. It's just I haven't had one this bad in a year. The last one that made me cry was about..." my brother, "my mom. I just don't understand why I feel so scared. It wasn't scary at all. I don't know, Minho."

"I think you should try to remove the stresses from your life. At least find a better way to cope with them. These nightmares are probably caused by your stress. It at least has something to do with it," he says, pulling away from the hug and wiping my tears away gently.

"What do you suggest?" I question, knowing that I've already tried counseling, medication, etc.

"Come to me for help. Or the others. Talk it out with us. Try to take breaks. I know you've been getting a lot of headaches recently. Try different pain relievers."

"I will. Thank you. Tonight, I really don't want to go back to sleep. I'm still really scared. I don't want to have another one," I admit, going to move off of his lap, but he doesn't let me.

"I'll stay the night," he proposes. "I don't mind as long as it helps you sleep."

I bite my lip, thinking it over, "if you're okay with it, then sure. I have to call and tell my mom though."

"Okay. I'll call mine, too. For now, do you want to watch a movie? Or do you have homework?" He smiles knowingly, making me groan.

"I hate that you like keeping good grades in school. Can't you just give me the answers?"

"I don't have my bag, angel. It's at school."

"You're really annoying sometimes."

"I know," he giggles before leaning forward and kissing my lips. It takes me by surprise, but I don't hesitate to kiss back.

"Okay," he pulls away, "go get your stuff and I'll help you, baby."

_____

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