Namjoon Likes Black Girls • Namjoon Centric •

68

While the entire call was in Korean, Namjoon sounded extremely professional, taking down notes and reading off articles from different tabs on his laptop. It was clear as day how important his position in society is now. He holds himself like a confident man. A strong leader. A secure home.

I couldn't tear my eyes away from his broad back. The way his folded fingers supported his chin as he wrote whatever on his notepad, clearly focused on listening and writing at the same time. He then spoke, referring to the notepad. In that sentence, his voice got a lot deeper.

Honestly, I missed this. Just being in the same room as him and just watching him. Watching all of his tiny habits and listening to his small hums. Just the sound of the pen scribbling across the page, mixed with his deep voice mumbled in response to what ever his boss was saying.

And then the call ended with a small wave. Namjoon immediately turned around to face me, a smile growing on his face as he rose from his chair.

"What was the meeting about? It seemed serious." I watched him sit across from me on the bed.

"It's about our next album. We're collaborating with Ed Sheeran and so my boss was just telling me about the things we've received from his team and the potential date of the beginning of production. He was also asking me about how much progress I've made so far on the demo track, which isn't that much."

"You really are an idol..." I smiled a little, my voice softer.

"I'm sorry about that again. I should have told you from the start about us. But I'm just happy that I'm in the same room as you again." His eyes were gentle, his voice soothing.

"It's okay Namjoon. You don't gotta apologize anymore." I assured and dropped my hands into my lap.

"Well..." Here comes the questions that I've been dreading, "How have you been?" I wasn't expecting that question.

"O-oh.. I've been fine... How have you been?" Just answering made the butterflies spark once more. I expected him to ask about why I left or how did I get here. But I should know Namjoon better than that.

"I haven't been the best. But I've been keeping it together." He nodded with a small chuckle. The air was silent for a while. "It's so weird to see you again. Part of me thought I would never see you again." He looked away from my eyes, staring at his fingers trace the seams of his pajama pants.

"We pinky promised. I never break a promise; unlike somebody." I playfully rolled my eyes. He quickly looked back up at me, confusion coating his face. "Didn't I tell you not to be sad after I left?"

"O-oh right... well it was kinda difficult. You left behind my back... I didn't even get to say bye." His voice was very gentle, every word very clearly enunciated. Sure Jin and Minseong both told me that he's been sad lately, but seeing it myself just... broke my heart... "I-I mean.. how I've felt hasn't been your fault. It's me feeling sad for myself. Because I'm guilty." He quickly clarified with his hands out and his eyebrows raised.

"I'm just as guilty as you are, Namjoon. There's no right in this situation. But... if you have anymore huge secrets-"

"I don't! I promise! Us being Idols was the only thing. If there's anything else, then it's a secret from me too beca-" He started to ramble. He stopped talking when I reached out to hold his open hands. "B-because-..."

"Then I'm not going anywhere, Namjoon. I can promise that. Well, until I leave when you guys get to Atlanta."

"Two weeks again? I guess I have another chance to redo last time." He smiled down at our hands.

"I don't wanna replace it. Sure it was bad at times, but I still enjoyed it. Especially when I was with you guys." I assured. He gave my hands a tight squeeze and he chuckled a little.