But I'm a Villain

A Fighter

   We've been on this mission for 2 weeks so far, and when I said it would be my living hell I meant it. What is it I have to do? Participate in the biggest war between villains and heroes I've ever seen. It's not a fight, it's like an actuall full out war. The old man took my phone the second we started this shit so I've had zero contact with Denki this entire time. I felt like I was continuously losing my mind with every day that passed.
   Did I enjoy the work? Yes, I honestly did. This is probably one of the biggest murder sprees I've ever been on and I'm having the time of my life, but that's only in the moment. The second we're done for the day it just brings me back to my reality. I felt so lonely despite being around so many people I cared about. I felt sad all the time aswell, the only time I wasn't sad was when I'm out on the battlefield.
   I hated this feeling, the feeling of guilt and sadness all mixed into one. Dabi, Tomura, and Himiko caught on right away what was going on with me and do their best to help me, but it's never enough. I need to go back, I need Denki, I need my son. I just need to hold them in my arms.
   "Hitoshi, we need you on the frontline." All For One said as he walked over to me. I quickly stood up, just wanting to end this. I took my weapons and darted onto the field, slashing every enemy that came my way. The adrenaline hit me not too long after I started, pulling me out of whatever depressive state I was in just seconds ago. All the negative thoughts left my head as I got closer and closer to the front line, seeing Dabi and Tomura start coming into view.
   I caught up to them in record time, helping out in whatever way I could. I felt on top of the world in this moment. It was kind of sad if you really think about it, the only time I can feel good right now is when I'm covered in blood and taking people's lives. How messed up is that?
   The day seemed to pass in seconds, I only knew it was over when a whistle blared to indicate that it was time to retreat for the day. I followed suite as the league ran back to base, Tomura throwing an arm around me as we ran. "You'll be back soon kid, we're almost done here." He said with a confident smile. I simply nodded, feeling my mood slowly start to decline again.
   By the time we got back to base I felt drained. While everybody gathered around to start drinking and talking I went off to where my bed was, if you could really call it a bed. I layed down under the blanket and curled up into a ball until I physically couldn't anymore. My thoughts flooded with Denki and Haruka, tears starting to fall down my face as my chest began to tighten. I missed them, more than I ever thought I could.
   Dabi and Tomura stopped in multiple times to check on me, but I sent them away every time. I just layed there the whole night, crying as I thought of what Denki was doing and how he might be feeling. I cried just until I ended up somehow falling asleep.
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   "Hitoshi, focus!" Tomura called out from across the battlefield. I was completely out of it today. I just couldn't get my mood to raise, no matter how much I fought.
"I am focused!" I called back as I finished off one of the enemies. It was just before nightfall, meaning we were almost finished with today's work. I can't say I was really excited for it as I knew I'd just be in my room crying all night again. I'd barely eaten anything or slept the entire time we've been here, it's slowly starting to become more obvious. My movements were getting slower and I was starting to struggle to keep up. I was one of our best fighters so this took a toll on the league.
Regrdless of this I continued to fight. No matter how shitty I felt, I fought. No matter how much I just wanted to stay in my room and cry, I fought. I fought because I knew it was the only way to get back to Denki. I fought because I knew if I didn't I'd be letting my family down. I fought because it was the only thing I knew how to do. As the old man constantly told me, I was a fighter at heart.
I quickly finished off another enemy, regaining myself before moving onto the next person. I slashed, and slashed, and slashed as blood sprayed across the battlefield. After all this time I was finally starting to feel a little better, though not by much. The sun was slowly starting to set more and more. Today was so close to being over, but I couldn't stop yet.
Shots were being fired at me but stopped as a wave of blue flames took out the gunner. I continued on with what I was doing, finishing off yet another enemy. I rushed farther into the battle, finding where Tomura was fighting a group of heroes. I joined him, fighting back to back with Tomura as we took out each and every enemy that stood in our way. Once they were taken care of we headed back to where I last saw Dabi, though as we started running I felt my head go fuzzy.
Before we found Dabu I heard the whistle blow in the distance and slowly started to walk off. After a few seconds of walking I noticed nobody else was walking away. I found this strange but continued on, just wanting to go back. I could hear people calling my name in the distance but wasn't able to focus on anything. My limbs were starting to feel heavy and my vision was blurred.
I felt my hands move to my stomach, when I pulled them away they were wet. I didn't have time to do anything else as I collapsed to the ground. The world started to spin as people kept calling my name. The last thing that popped into my head was Denki, then everything went black.