Welcome to Jackass

CHAPTER THIRTY SEVEN

KNOXVILLE:

I woke up early today, very early. It's about 10 am now and I have been up for like 4 hours or something. I stayed in bed at first, cuddling Mads until I decided to get up and get coffee. I got caught up in a couple emails and forgot about the coffee all together up until right now. Maddy started moving around so I decided to make us some coffees. She must have woken up and not seen me next to her in bed and considering my track record, that wasn't too good of a feeling.

"Knox!" She yelled.

"I'm right here baby! I'm getting coffee." I yelled back. I bet that gave her some peace of mind. I went back into the room, two coffee cups in one hand since I have the fucking cast on my right hand.

"Sorry I yelled, I thought you left." She says shyly. She looks so beautiful. Sitting on the bed we share, hair all messy, cheeks all rosy and sleepy eyes.

"That's fine sweets, I'm right here. Coffee?" I offer and she nods.

"Does your head hurt?" She asks.

"No, why?" I ask, puzzled.

"You're wearing your glasses, we can close the curtains if you want." She looks guilty. This poor girl is traumatized, she didn't even do anything and she still looks guilty, I'll have to talk to her about that some time.

"No baby, it's fine. It's out of habit I think. I didn't even notice I had them on." I say, taking my glasses off and squinting at the sudden change in light. She smiles.

"How's your hand?" She asks, blowing on her coffee.

"It's alright." I say holding my hand up and moving my fingers around. We finish our coffee and have some delightful morning talk.

"Wanna shower with me?" I ask as I stand up. She stays quiet for a minute and I turn to look at her, completely fixated on the window, not even listening to me. "Mouse?" I ask again. No response. "Mads." I say a little bit louder, she jumps and I feel bad immediately. "I'm sorry Mads I didn't mean to scare ya. You went quiet on me again, do you feel alright?"

"Sorry PJ, yeah I'm fine, just a little out of it I guess."

"Don't be sorry. Shower with me?" She looks uneasy and speaks.

"I don't know Knox, I'm really sore."

"We don't have to fuck Mads, I just wanna shower with you that's all." I say shrugging my shoulders. She smiles and nods.

I go to turn the shower on and see her waddling towards me. I chuckle while putting a bag over my cast. I can't get it wet so this'll have to do.

"I am actually really fucking sore, christ." She says.

"You're feeding my ego." I say, taking my boxers off and stepping in the shower.

"Shut up Knoxville." She says getting undressed. She walks into the shower with me and steps under the water while I wash my hair.

"JOHNNY!" I turn to look at her in fear at why she's screaming when she jumps towards me. I cover her with my arms and look around and try to find what the hell scared her so bad.

"What?! What happened?!" I ask her.

"The water is like, freezing cold asshat!" She yells and I cackle.

"Sorry princess, I forgot you like to shower in lava." I say, turning the nozzle so that the water warms up. She spreads shampoo on her hair and we finish our shower. She decided to get in bed and watch TV in her bathrobe. I much rather have a towel wrapped around my hips and call it a day. I can't help but smile. Seeing her laying in bed, in a bathrobe. It's extremely domestic and I love it.

"What?" she says, smiling those bunny teeth at me. She's happy she caught me staring at her.

"Nothing baby." I smile back at her.

MADDY:

"I feel like I'm gonna hurt you."

"You're not gonna hurt me Mads." Johnny says, standing in front of me with his hands on either side of my hips.

"I don't know why I'm doing this." I say, sitting on the bathroom counter with Knoxville's razor in my hand.

"Maddy, I need your help, I can't do it with my left hand and my right hand can't bend this way." He says, stressed out.

"Still, this is harder than just rubbing my clit for you." I say chuckling, he cackles and looks down.

"Okay fuck, just go. Gently please." He says. I spread the shaving cream all over his stubble. He explained how to do it so I think I'll be able to. I gently start shaving his face.

"Just like that Mads, just go down, yep." He guides me. I'm on the last bit of his jaw when he decides to scare the shit out of me.

"AH!" He winces. I let out the loudest shriek and jump off the counter. He holds his stomach, unable to contain his laughter.

"Philip John Clapp! You asshole!" I say with tears leaking out of my eyes. I run into the bedroom and get under the covers.

"Mads! C'mon baby, I was kidding!" He says. I hear the water running and Johnny trying to control his laughter. I sniffle and cry quietly. I'm not even mad at him, at all. I just have no control over when I cry. The covers start moving and suddenly they are removed from over me. I am met with a clean shaven Knoxville.

"Baby..." He comforts me and pulls me in for a hug. "I'm sorry baby, that shit was priceless." He says laughing.

"You are such an asshole Knoxville." I say, wiping the tears off my face and laughing along with him. "I actually think I did a good job." I say, holding his jaw and inspecting his face.

"You sure did. Thank you." He says, pecking my lips. "Let's get some breakfast, I'm fucking starving!"

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A/N: cute little chapter