The Fortunate

51

THIRD PERSON

He is busy cutting her nails while waiting for her to wake up. "Do you want to know why I can't look at you when you're crying?" He asked, as if his wife would hear it.

He sighed, "Because I'm too scared,"

"My mother cried at me, she asked me to save her from dying," he told his sleeping wife.

"Joaquin, tulungan mo ako,"

"Ayaw ko pang mamatay,"

"I love you, my son. Please save me,"

He gulped after reminiscing his mother's last words. "She was so young the day she died, I feel so bad that I can't do anything to save her. It was helpless, even money can't save her life,"

"That's why I'm scared when you cry. I know to myself that money can't save your tears. I can't wipe it because I don't know anything else besides money. Many other people cry for me but, you're the only person who reminded me about the fear I had because of my mom,"

"The fear of failing someone, I should have realized what you mean to me that time," he told her.

"The first time I saw you cried is when your father declined to come in our wedding. I want to do something to make you feel better, but the fear suddenly came back. If I try to make you feel better that time, I might just mess up and dissapoint you more,"

"I can't heal you, I am so sorry because I'm afraid that you will depend on me just like what my mother did. I can't save you," he looked down.

But it is too late, he must have known that Sula can't depend on herself alone. She used to lean on anybody. And for that, it felt like a pressure for Joaquin. He is afraid to feel the trauma of being trapped in an alley where all his loved ones ask him to save them.

"If ever you'll cry because of me again, I still can't guarantee that I can look at your eyes this time. It is so hard, Sula. Pero kung sa ganoong paraan ay maramdaman mong sincere ako, I will force myself to wipe your tears away," he promised.

But he knows that it will be hard for him, it makes him tremble to death, he can't breathe properly just by staring at her teary eyes. Still, he wants to overcome it.

"I don't want you to cry again," he muttered.

Maybe the best thing to do is to keep Sula's tears away. He must not let her cry, he must not do anything that will make his wife cry again.

"Gusto ko nang makita ang mga mata mo ulit, dumilat ka na kasi, Sula," reklamo nito. Ilang buwan din niyang hindi nasilayan ang mga mata ng asawa. Ang huling silay pa niya'y umiiyak ito.

While adoring her features, someone called his number. ["Mr. Bermuda, someone is insisting to talk with you but he has no appointment. Ayaw niya rin pong magpakausap sa iba,"] sambit ng kaniyang assistant.

"Escort him out of the building. As if you're not doing it in regular basis?" Sarcastic nitong sambit.

His assistant breathed heavily before speaking again, ["Mister, sinasabi po kasi ni Sir na kaibigan daw po siya ng wife niyo--"]

["Si Sir Joaquin na ba iyan?"] Pakikisabat ng nasa kabilang linya.

"Who? Give the phone to him," naiintriga nitong sambit. He badly wants someone to talk to, especially Sula's friends.

["Sa wakas, sir!"] Natutuwa nitong sambit.

"Sino ka?" He is quite disappointed because it is not the voice of her college friends. He can't trust other people except Caleb and his circle of friends where Sula belonged.