dreiundsiebzig

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over a month had passed by and jisung was on the brink of insanity.

it felt like forever since chenle opened the door to actually talk to someone, practically ghosting even bae's desperate calls for her aunt to come back. for most of the time, jisung endured it as he knew how much emotional one can be during such a pivotal part of their life...but this was too much. 

heaving a sigh, jisung stormed to the door and with all his strength, swung open the wood, resulting in the door slamming against the wall, startling chenle who was still weeping.

chenle's condition was pathetic to say the least. his face was scattered with dried up tears, his voice muffled and nasal as he had been crying himself to sleep for days on end, his clothes messy and ragged and the fluffball was lying in the corner, whimpering as she did.

keeping his calm, he approached the younger with a stern face. "alright, this has been too much for me to handle. what happened to you, chenle? did someone hurt you or something? you can't just hide it away like this!"

chenle fell silent as his head drooped down, his fingers fidgetting as he gathered his residual confidence to confront the older. "hyung..." he started, "i...met my ex..."

that sentence was more than enough for jisung's worry to skyrocket. his eyes widened with concern as he gently held the younger's hand, letting him find his words to speak. "take your time...i know it's really hard to talk about..."

"hyung..." chenle started to explain. "h-he...wanted me...to come back...but i...p-pushed him away a-and said...i-i didn't n-need him...anymore...what have...i done..."

chenle started to berate himself for rejecting his ex-boyfriend just because of his crappy mood, regretting it heavily. sighing, jisung deduced it was his turn to save the situation. "i know it's really hard to endure this and the fact that it was all on accident, but we can always apologize...right?"

chenle ceased his crying as he glanced at his neighbour longingly, before tears started to blur his vision once again. "will he...accept me...? a-after all...i had done...? even after...i hurt him...so many times...?"

jisung composed himself and let out a sigh, caressing chenle's head in order to comfort him. "look, chenle, he will forgive you, even though he's hurt, he probably had forgotten about it. we'll ask-"

jisung was interrupted as chenle's phone started to buzz, much to both their annoyance. chenle picked up the device to see it was jaemin calling him. "what is it, bitch?" he asked rather harshly.

"what the actual fuck did you do to jisung?!" jaemin's static-filled voice retorted, with genuine anger— something that was completely rare coming from him. "you basically killed him on the inside! and don't even fucking try to talk to him anymore, i don't want to see you ever again!"

those words were enough to clear chenle's query and it was an answer he was expecting anyways.

the device fell from his hands as tears fell from his eyes, a wobbling smile curling his lips as he approached the older, grabbing his hand in a vice-like grip.

"hyung...we don't need to, he won't accept the apology anways."

🍂

jaemin hung up the call as he turned back to the younger, frowning as he did. "i had to, don't you dare fucking talk to that piece of shit. he isn't worth it, got it?"

jisung fell silent as he looked at his marred hands, freshly bandaged after another round of self-harm. as lifeless as he can be, he felt his heart break at the sudden gatekeeping, albeit he understood it was for his sake.

jaemin's stern façade melted as he ruffled jisung's hair, sighing as he did. "it's for your sake, jisungie, please understand. chenle's only going to cause even more problems. you have to move on, please."

"are you sure this will work?" mark queried, his eyebrows scrunched into a concerned frown as he eyed the younger with diffidence. "what if...chenle's also hurt by those words...and also end up...doing...that...?"

mark cannot help but space his words to insinuate the gravely triggering incident as jisung was right in front of them. composing himself, jaemin turned to mark in a serious yet reassuring tone, much to their relief. "don't worry about that, hyung, chenle would never do such a thing even during his worst, trust me."

(a/n: reminds me of the meme, "source: trust me bro" lmao)

jisung and mark had their doubts but decided to heed jaemin's words as he knew chenle the most; the two had been best friends for 3 years already. sighing, mark spoke out. "but, still, don't you think you were a little too harsh on him?"

"nah, he needs to know what kinds of fucked up shit he caused," jaemin scoffed, turning to jisung. "sungie's like my child, my son, even more than his own mother could. of course, i'll chide anyone who hurts him and that includes my own best friend."

jaemin suddenly took notice of renjun walking albeit dejectedly from the corner and immediately knew it was his cue to leave so that the older would not know he had visited them. he bid a hasty farewell at the two before speedwalking out of the place. "so, it's time for me to go, nono's waiting for me, bye, you two!"

before either jisung or mark could respond, jaemin left the place, running away to his dorms frantically. by that time, renjun arrived, his fingers trembling as he drooped his head down as he took notice of the youngest. "i went off to see kun-hyung," he explained with a wobbling smile to his husband, which only grew less in intensity as he turned to jisung, reaching out his hand to hold his. "h-how's everything going-"

"don't fucking start," jisung retorted almost immediately, much to mark's dismay, and much to renjun's expectations. renjun instantly backed off as he turned to go inside his quaint little home, almost tearing up in the process.

mark fell silent, letting out a heavy sigh as he followed suit, wanting nothing more than to comfort his husband as jisung clearly did not want to change.

it has been like this for 2 months already. renjun would always, always try desperately to either get in touch with chenle or try to make amends with jisung— both of which he had been failing miserably at. chenle never responds to his calls while jisung always cuts him off mid-sentence and gives him a very frigid shoulder.

how the hell was he supposed to help anyways?

despite being renjun's husband, mark cannot help but withhold the pent up rage inside him instead of lashing out at jisung and chenle. doing so is a douchebad move, and he was not considering either of their situations while simultaneously being biased towards his own partner. 

but, sometimes, mark just wished things would be back to normal— a time where jisung and chenle are finally back together, forgetting their enmity towards renjun and letting him come back to what he used to be...long time ago.

a/n: oml i'm literally in a fucking rush rn sdkfsdfjdsfksdf </3

k so, by the time march 8 is finished, expect reolli regular double updates because i already finished writing most of the chapters in my journal already. i really can't stay here for long because i lied to my parents that i had to finish some project so that i could publish one last update.

now, i gtg, bye, stream phantom and candy for clear skin <3

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