Perfectly Imperfect Love

chapter 57

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Susheela pov
Seeing the pregnancy test reports there I had no clue what to do. When I was forced to go for a regular checkup I was greeted by a nurse which lead me to the doctor and i answered all the questions asked by her, expecting normal fatigue or food poisoning case but what turned my world upside was when the doctor said
"I think you are pregnant, you should give your samples for the test"
I was awestruck. Never in my lifetime i have imagined this would happen. I have never thought of having kids before and that too at this point of time where there was no hope of survival left in my life. Pramod and i were almost finished. We were broken people. He was burning the agony of revenge unknown of the truth and i the result- the ashed of his burns. The day I realised my love for him, the day I married him. Our lives had been interlinked, whether we were aloof or together we were bound to each other and we knew it. But what happened between us last 2 weeks ago, broke me. Pramod's revenge finally broken my hopes, my willingness to live and stay happy. I was just waiting for him to come home and abuse me again so that I can die in peace, because I was not having any more energy in me of starting a new life and living. My parents and family disowned me, my twin hates me and offcourse my husband hates me too. With this much burden ,i couldn't live. I wanted to die happily after seeing him one last time. And in middle of all this thinking of the possibility of me having a little life inside of me, symbolising my love for pramod and our broken connection, my world turned upside down. I started at the doctor dumbfounded until she took the blood sample. I was busy in my thoughts when someone knocked the door. Mini aunty was there. The doctor greeted her and told her that I might be pregnant. Listening to this she with excitement cameto me and said
" I am soo happy for you and I am so excited for my grandchild. I have never expected i will say this to you but I think I am sorry for what all happened, but still I am happy as you are going to give me my grandchild, thank you!, And yes you can share this news with your family. I cannot redo the past but we can try to rebuild our bond for your and my grandchild's sake, come lets share this news with pramod first"

It was too much for me to digest this much. I didn't move a bit when she said all this. Was it all this simple and easy for her to spoil two people's lives and then correct it with a simple sorry? Was my life a joke to her? Or have i really judged her to be good person? I was already in a dilemma and in confusion about the possibility of me being pregnant and then this lady has the audacity to apologise to me like this. I feel like to cry. The possibility of facing pramod today and telling him this kills me. I don even know what will he do when he gets to know this. If I really am pregnant will he accept this child? Or will he tell me to abort it? To be honest I am not ready to have a child but the thought of aborting my baby just because I want to die, is'nt doing any good to me , it makes me feel horrible things. so I don't know what to do and what not,because just a mere apology is not gonna bring my pramod back, it is not gonna mend my relations and most importantly it is not gonna make me forget the things pramod put me through. And right now I am not ready to face him with this possible news. I wanna run away from him. Somewhere far where he cannot find me and I can think, think all day and decide how I wanna deal with things and face him one last time giving him the closure. Because at this point me and him being together is impossible. If I am not pregnant, which I prefer i will face him and die, but if I am pregnant then i really don't wanna face him. I wanna stay away from him and raise my child but the mere thought me living alone, leaving everything behind gives me goosebumps. I don't know what to do . I am doomed. I am so done with my life, so done suffering and so done dealing with the faint heartbreak that stabs my heart every time think of him. I am shattered. I am doomed.

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Next chapter is gonna be intense.
And yes the story is coming to an end!!!
Next update: Sunday or modnday; or maybe early.