The summer I llǝɟ for her || 𝐌𝐚𝐱 𝐌𝐚𝐲𝐟𝐢𝐞𝐥𝐝

64. 𝑩𝒂𝒄𝒌 𝒕𝒐 𝒔𝒄𝒉𝒐𝒐𝒍.

⚠️suicide and eating disorder themes⚠️

Chapter 64~ Back to school.

A week had gone by and Arwen was starting to adjust as best as she could to being back at home. She had decided to talk to her mom and they made up, she was managing to walk a little better, she was talking in full sentences again and even decided to give school a chance. Although Arwen was feeling a little better under the circumstances, she hadn't really gone outside and was completely glued to Max's side. Which brings us to Max, who after telling Arwen how she felt, completely retracted back. She felt like she was back in the place she was a couple months after Billy died, still wishing she could have taken Arwen's place, everything that happened was catching up with her, the things Vecna told her, almost dying twice.

~

Max now found herself in the bathroom, it was 2am and Arwen was fast asleep back in the bedroom. She slowly walked over the sink and looked stared at herself in the mirror, a single tear rolled down her cheek before she ran the tap and splashed water over her face. Placing her hands back on the sink, she looked back in the mirror and let out a deep breath before opening the bathroom cabinet that contained all sorts of pain meds for Arwen. She stared at them for a while with thoughts spinning around her head at a hundred miles per hour before grabbing one of the bottles.

Having to leave her dad back in California.
Watching Billy die right in front of her.
Arwen dying in her arms.
Being cursed.
Seeing Arwen in a coma.

Everything was too much for her, it was getting harder and harder to see a reason to stay when there was always something happening.

Tears were now rapidly escaping Max's eyes as her hands remained tightly around the bottle, she didn't know what to do.

"No!" A sudden scream came from Arwen's room, startling Max. Without hesitation, she threw the pill bottle down and rushed into Arwen's room to see her sat up in bed desperately trying to catch her breath, "Arwen?!"

"It's- just a nightmare- I'm okay." She panted but it didn't make Max worry any less, "what-" Max started but Arwen quickly cut her off, "please can you just lay with me." The look on Arwen's face broke Max's heart, "yeah." Max whispered and got under the covers, immediately pulling Arwen into her embrace.

"Max I need to tell you something." Arwen said quietly, she instantly felt her face heat up, "when I was in a coma...or when my body was anyway- the first time he made me think you were all dead." Her voice cracked, "I didn't want to be here anymore." She admitted, "why would I need to when the worst thing has happened?" She said making Max remember that she had said a similar thing when Arwen was in a coma, "I tried to...jump off-" a sob cut off her sentence as Max's eyes widened, realising what she meant, tears slowly spilling from her eyes too, "he wouldn't let me...and everyday after I was thinking how could I do this to you...just not wake up when you would never do that to me." She cried making a wave of guilt instantly hit Max, she was wanting to do the same thing the two weeks Arwen wasn't awake, even still.

"Arwen." Max whispered, "I can't begin to imagine the things he made you see...you had no idea wether you would return here again and even if you did you thought we were all gone. You don't have to feel guilty for feeling like that." She explained. Arwen didn't say anything else, she was exhausted and ended up crying herself to sleep in Max's arms.

It was getting harder to see if their love was built on just pure love or all the trauma they had been through together.

~

"Are you sure you're ready to go back?" Max asked as they both got ready for school. Arwen knew she wanted to go back, I mean, she never hated school plus being stuck in the hospital for a month has made anything sound better, "yes." She smiled, "but after the nightmare last night-"