A Hot Night with You

Chapter 20

I missed him a LOT.

But I can't and he will never be mine again.

So, I stepped back and inhaled a large amount of air.

I look to him again, with a smile plastered on my face. I didn't bother if it's genuine or not. At least I am trying to be civil.

I cleared my throat, "May kailangan kayo, Sir?"

My voice was a little bit shaky but I did made sure that I am not nervous talking him right now.

Hindi pa rin ito nagsasalita, bagkus ay nakatingin lamang sa akin. I tried to read his expression, but I failed. I am hesitating too because of his aura- so strict.

Tinitigan ko ulit ito ng mabuti, mas lalong dumepina iyong hugis ng mukha niya at mas lalo kong napansin na umaliwalas ang hitsura nito. There's a pain in my chest knowing that he was not in his good shape with me before. Siguro nga'y alagang-alaga siya ni Nesha ngayon.

Palihim kong ipinilig ang aking ulo, marami na namang mga negatibong bagay ang pumapasok sa isipan ko. And it is not healthy.

"Sir?!" tawag ko ulit sa kaniya.

Mariin niya akong tinitigan direcho sa mga mata ko. Nakakailang tignan pabalik kaya lumingon ako sa kabilang gawi.

"How are you?"

His rough voice sent shiver down to my spine. Honestly, I really miss it.

I look to him again, " I am fine, Sir." I casually stated.

He sighed. I can see how his adam apples move fastly and his reactions became differently.

"That's good to hear. And I hope you moved on." He said.

Napaurong ang dila ko sa sinabi niya. Pinapamukha talaga.

I smirk, "I am okay now, I am on the process of moving on and forgetting you."

I saw how his lips rose because of what I have said. Bakit? Wala na ba akong karapatang ipagtanggol ang sarili ko.

"That's really good. At least we can't be awkward with each other."

Nahimigan ko ang yabang sa tono ng boses niya.

"With all due respect, may I asked why are you really here? Hindi ka naman po ata pumunta rito para lang kamustahin ako at sabihang dapat ay magmove-on sa'yo." matapang kong saad sa kaniya.

Ngumisi ito, " What? Are you hoping that I came here to give you a second chance and be with you together again?" di makapaniwala niyang saad.

"Hindi ko alam ang sinasabi mo. At kung ano man iyan ay wala na akong paki do'n. Makakaalis na ho kayo, Sir."

Mabilis akong naglakad sa direksiyon niya upang makapasok sa silid ko. My heart beats fast and I know for sure that it is not right for me.

Mabilis niyang nahawakan ang braso ko at mahigpit nitong hinawakan.

"Get your hands off of me, Sir. I have nothing against with you." matapang kong saad ulit.

"You are still my-"

"Your what? For your fcvking information, I am no longer your lover, but I am still your soldier. Iyan lang ang koneksiyon natin sa isa't-isa."

Hinaklit ko ang aking braso sa pagkakahawak niya. Nilingon ko ito at ginawaran ng matalim na tingin bago pihitin ang doorknob para pumasok.

Pagkaapak ko sa loob at pagkasara ng pinto ay siya namang pagbuga ko ng marahas na hininga. Parang nalalagutan ako ng hininga kapag kausap at kaharap ko siya. Hindi pa rin talaga nawawala iyong sakit na pinaranas niya sa akin, bumabalik at unti-unti na naman ako nitong dinudurog ng pino.