Trapped in my head

Chapter 61

A few weeks later

When Meredith woke up in the morning Andrew wasn't lying next to her for some reason. His sheets were cold, as if he had left over an hour ago. Sitting up Meredith looked around, sighing in relief as she saw that his close were still there. He hadn't left. He had just gone downstairs. After her having had two nightmares during the night he had apparently decided to let her sleep in and not wake her up.

Letting herself fall back into the pillows she closed her eyes again. She was exhausted and her eyes were burning as if they were on fire. But on the other hand- she could smell coffee- and maybe- she could sneak herself a cup without anyone noticing. Smiling slightly she got up, grabbing her robe and wrapping it around her as she was only wearing her panties and a crop top in which she didn't want to encounter her sisters. Or worse, their boyfriends.

Walking downstairs she found Andrew sitting at the kitchen table, focused on the screen of his laptop. "Morning." Meredith said, walking over to him and bending down to kiss his cheek. "Hey, you're up." He said, smiling at her. "How did you sleep?" he asked her as she walked over to the sink and making sure that he could only see her back. "Okay." She replied. He didn't know about the nightmares she had this night since she had somehow managed not to have a panic attack. Turning around again with only her blue mug in her hands she smiled at him. Now he thought that all she had in there was her milk.

"What happened to Saturday's pyjamas?" he asked, chuckling as she looked down quickly, covering herself up again. "No! I like the view!" he said as she closed her robe tightly again, glaring at him. "They were- not available." She mumbled, taking another sip of the wonderful coffee. The truth was, that she had been sweating so unbearably that she had to change in the middle of the night as her Saturday's pyjamas had been drenched in cold sweat from her night terrors.

Sighing, he got up, walking over to her and looking into her cup. "Meredith." He said, not being able to hide his smile though. "That's- hot chocolate." She said, taking another sip. "Is it?" he asked her, raising a brow. "No." she said defeatedly, looking down and placing the mug on the counter.

But as she looked up at him, she was met with a contagious smile. Leaning in she gently placed her lips on his, starting to kiss him. He on the other side slowly untied her robe and let his hand slip around her bare waist, making her giggle. "Can I please drink the coffee? Pleeaase?" she asked, biting her lip, after pulling away again. She knew exactly how to get what she wanted. "Fine. But just that one cup." He gave in, not being able to resist her. Grinning brightly she grabbed the cup and took another sip.

"I actually have to tell you something." He said, walking back over to the table and sitting down in front of his laptop again. "What is it?" she asked, following him and sitting down next to him. "I had the most amazing dream last night. I think I've never really told you that but- when I was in college I had a motorcycle. I sold it when I moved here but- riding a motorcycle is the most indescribable amazing feeling in the entire world. And I dreamed about that feeling and- I know how spontaneous that is but- I'm going to buy myself a motorcycle! How amazing is that!" he said excitedly, smiling brightly at her.

"Here, take a look at it. That one's my favourite so far." He said, turning the laptop so that she could see it.

But Andrew's excitement didn't really rub off on Meredith. She just stared right at the screen, at a huge, expensive, black, shiny, deadly motorcycle. He was joking right? He had to be joking. "That's- a lot of money." She pointed out, not really able to tare her gaze away. "I know it is but- this is like- my dream. I've always wanted that kind of motorcycle and finally I have enough money. I know it's a lot but- I have a nice place for which rent is really affordable and I have some savings. It's just- I really need this." He said, still smiling brightly at her.

She swallowed hard, her airways already starting to close up as her anxiety was taking over. Andrew wanted to by himself an expensive deadly dead-machine. How could he be so- tactless and stupid. The past weeks she had been dealing with the most horrific nightmares, showing her all kind of scenarios of him dying, and know he wants to buy a motorcycle? A motorcycle? Did he have any idea how easily accidents happen and how deadly most of them were when they involved motorcycles? He was working at a hospital for god's sake he saw those kind of injuries every day.

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" she asked with a small voice, looking up at him with tears already forming in her eyes. "Yes I am. Meredith I- right now I have almost everything I have ever wanted for my life at this point. I have an amazing job, I have an even more amazing girlfriend but the only thing missing is this." He said, laying his arm around her and kissing the side of her head. "You're buying a motorcycle." She whispered, desperately trying to keep herself together. "I am." He said, still not seeming to realise what was going on inside of her head just a few inches away from him.

____________

"Tom? I'm back! They didn't have the cereal you wanted anymore so I bought something similar." David yelled as he entered the small house they were living in. "Tom?" he yelled again but didn't get a response. Walking into the kitchen he found a post it note on the table saying:

I'm at the neighbour's house to see if I can get some more of their home grown zucchini for dinner.

Smiling he shook his head, starting to unpack the groceries and store them in the shelfs and refrigerator. As he was almost done he picked up a nice lavender soap he had bought for their bathroom as it fitted the lavender theme they had picked out for the room perfectly. But opening the door he saw something unexpected. Meredith was laying in their king-sized bed, fast asleep. Walking over to her he took a closer look at her face, spotting the dried tear-strains on her cheeks. Immediately he started to worry. Had something happened? Why hadn't she called? Did Tom know that she was here?

Just in this second he heard the front door open so that he quickly walked out again and quietly closed the door behind him. "Hey you're back! Did you get my cereal?" Tom asked, his arms full of zucchini. "No they- didn't have it anymore. Did you know that Meri is here?" he asked, placing the soap down on the table. "No- where is she?" Tom asked confused, unloading the zucchini onto the table as well. "She's asleep in our bed. I think she was crying." He said, looking at his husband with a concerned expression on his face.

"She must have used the spare key. She didn't say anything. What do you think happened?" Tom asked, sitting down. "I don't know. I just hope it wasn't Andrew who hurt her. Because if it was I will kill him." David said, getting angry. "David you need to calm down. He loves her he would never hurt her." Tom says, making David sit down as well. "We should just let her sleep a little and when she wakes up I'm sure she'll talk to us. If she already came here she is going to want to talk to us about it." He reassured him, taking his hand.

"Okay, you're right. I just hope it's nothing too bad."

Sorry for disappearing for so long =) But I guess I'm back now... Well, kinda, cause I just got accepted at Uni and I'll be moving by the end of the month so maybe I'll disappear again but I promise I'll come back! Always!