Don't let go: Joel Miller x OC

Stuck on you

Heart still pounding within her chest, Ava hastily tugged the hem of her skirt back over her thighs and made a B line towards shop door. Without so much as looking back, her only goal was to get home. Her mind conflicted over what she had just done. It was easier to not speak with him. It was easier to just walk away.

She pushed open the front door and called out, "Mads, you home?"

Silence surrounded her. She let out a relieved breath upon the realisation that she was alone, slumping slightly back against the partition she shut behind her. Perfect, Maddie was still out which meant that she wasn't about to be questioned to death.

The blonde kicked her shoes off and headed upstairs, stumbling slightly over the last step as she reached the landing. A small huff escaping her lips as she caught her balance. Perhaps she was a little more drunk than she initially thought...Maybe she could blame her actions on that?

She sighed as she reached her room, bypassing the ever so tempting comfort of her bed and instead entering the connecting ensuit. She closed the door behind her and rubbed her hands down her face. God, she felt disgusting.

"What is wrong with you..." She muttered to herself in a whisper as she caught a glimpse of her reflection in the mirror.

This was the one thing she promised herself to no longer do. Ava Monroe didn't have one night stands or flings with ex lovers- at least not since her mid twenties and especially not in public spaces with someone she was supposed to be furious at- not anymore! That girl was supposed to be far, far in the past.

She moved over to the toilet. She knew that she had to pee in order to avoid any sort of infection. That was the last thing she needed right now. She pulled her underwear down, the sticky reminance of what had just happened was still very much present in the crotch of her knickers. She scrunched her nose. He could have at least taken her underwear off.

It was an all too familiar scene, igniting old memories that she had forced all the way down when she first stepped foot in Jackson. Cramped in a tiny rundown restroom, desperately scrubbing off someone else's bodily fluids from between her legs. Flashbacks that made her feel sick to her stomach. Her time in Seattle and all the QZ's after coming back to haunt her...

She kicked her underwear to the side and let her satin dress fall to the floor as she reached for the faucet. Perhaps a shower would make her feel less dirty.

She hopped in the tub and let the warm water pour over her. She stood there deep in thought as the soothing steam swirled, surrounding her figure. Why did she do it? Why did she lure the man in and then have him fuck her against that bloody counter? The answer was simple, not that she wanted to admit to it. Seeing him talk with another woman is what did it. The way Esther had batted her piggy eyes up at him and smirked at whatever it was he had said. She didn't like it. It was suffocating to watch. She was jealous.

Perhaps if she wasn't drinking she would have been able to ignore it and move on. She had wanted to hate him for what he had done and she did for a short time, although that only lasted for a few days before the hatred started to wear off.

She would remind herself daily of the things he had done so she could remain angry at him, to stop her from running back but after hearing Tommy out, something changed. Maybe he wasn't so bad?

She felt ridiculous. After all, he had still murdered many innocent people but according to Tommy, he hadn't raped and tortured. It was the latter that bothered her the most and it was a relief that he wasn't as monstrous as she initially assumed. The sickened feeling she'd get when she thought of him stopped. He wasn't like the people that had captured her...