Don't let go: Joel Miller x OC

Mortal Pernicious Needs

A/N: This was a heavy one to write, phew! Just a heads up: Animal death, the last of the smut for this story!
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The days that followed were no easier. It was eerily quiet with the three of them riding in almost total silence. No chatter, no gentle breeze rustling through the tree tops, even the forests native bird life seemed to mute their chipper chirps. Just the gentle thuds of the horses heavy hooves thumping against the dried terrain and the occasional sniffle stifled against the fabric of Joel's back that was usually accompanied by a disappointed glance from Tommy followed by an exasperated head shake... If only his younger brother could put himself in his shoes but no, Tommy was seemingly smarter than that, than him. He was able to turn his emotions back on, stop the endless killings and living like a thug before it became all consuming, before he had a mile long queue of people wanting to serve his head on a silver platter to all those he had wronged. He was able to save himself ready for his future family. Tommy kept his family safe. Like a husband should, like a Father should.

Ava had barely said two words to him since he dragged her back out of that meadow by her limp hand and practically pulled her back into the saddle behind him. All vacant and numb. They had no choice but to share a mount... she had no other option but to suck in a deep breath and endure him. He had been like a leech sucking the crimson blood and vibrant life out of her just to leave her drained and empty. No, worse than that... he felt no better than the cordyceps that fucked the world upside down. Her pure warm blood drawing him in, irresistible to his insatiable hunger. Not stopping until his essence was coursing through her arteries, veins and blood vessels. Taking from her whatever he could get his hands on, whatever he desired without stopping to even question if he should. Altering her biological coding, making her his, crawling into her brain, breaking her down and moulding her to become whatever he wanted her to be. His darlin', his baby, his sweetheart. A lover, a wife, a mother- each of those persona's to benefit him. Her life dedicated to him. He the parasite, her the unsuspecting host. In her head, in her blood, even in the child she bore, he was always there. Wherever she was, he was there just taking and taking until there was nothing of herself left. Then there was nothing more to take but a whole lot to lose and so he couldn't stay, his sickness stowed upon her finally satiated and peeling away from her. Withdrawing from her brittle bones, seeping out from her dehydrated skin to leave her dried out and hollow... Just like the burned out infected, only that her infection had been him...

He managed two days of her riding behind him, her quiet weeps soaking the back of his shirt intermittently. He wanted to comfort her, tell her that it would all be okay but to her, it never would be, would it? So what was the point in saying anything at all? Instead, he pulled Maxi back to a halt and patted his palm against her thigh, leaning back to help manoeuvre her around to his front. This way her scalding tears couldn't be felt against his skin. This way he could still hold her in his arms. Still taking her warmth whilst ignoring her pain.

"I'll take the reins..." She muttered as she settled into the space between his thighs, hands almost snatching the leather tethers from his grip. Puffy eyes incapable of looking him directly in the face.

Joel's brows furrowed as he let the reins slide freely through the gaps of his fingers. "You sure?"

Her tone blunt as she responded. There was no malice in her words but the cold, void pronunciation felt something of a wet slap across his face, "Yes."

Her vexation towards him was warranted, he knew that. He would have rather seen her mourn his factitious demise than endure this animosity she had toward him. Terrible, right? Yet he still bathed in the simple fact that those six words had just about been the longest conversation they'd had in just over forty-eight pain staking hours.