Never | Lee Haechan

Hurt what you love

Haechan stared at the post on his open screen, rolling his tongue on the inside of his cheek. He  felt a pang in his chest as if someone stabbed him physically. Why was it so awfully worded as well?

Why...am I even...

He tried everything he could to shake his head off of it but he kept spacing out into the metallic floor of the van.

"Haechan? Haechan!" Jeno yelled into his earpiece making him wince at the sudden screechy loud sound in his ear.

"God I'm literally beside you," he furrowed his brows expressing his annoyance and the other gave him an agitated look. "Then stop spacing out before a fucking death mission,"

Jeno, who had freshly dyed blue hair, glared at his friend before turning to Jisung and Chenle to explain their positions to them again.

The brunette on the other hand got lost in his thoughts and questioned himself what he was even doing. He should be doing the briefing, not Jeno. Instead, he took his phone out of his pocket and went to a contact to see a few messages from Jiae. All of them asking him about where he was or when he'd be back- which he hadn't replied to yet. A lump formed in his throat and he swallowed it down before standing up.

But Jeno grabbed his arm, "What's bothering you?" He deadpanned at him.

He stared at the other male for a few seconds, contemplating what he should say; he felt his throat go dry. He'd never felt this way before.

"What do I do with a girl sending mixed signals?"

Jeno scoffed, "You're kidding right? Block her and see if she gives a shit," he let go of his arm, not understanding why Haechan was worried about something like this at such a crucial time.

"You had me thinking it was something serious,"

This was how conversations usually went between them when they talked about casual hookups. But this wasn't just another hookup to the brunette.........or was it?

The two younger boys left the van while Haechan tested his grip on his gun on his holster as a distraction from his screaming thoughts. No matter how much he tried shake it off, the mere wording of the post drilled into his mind. It made him feel used and his ego was bruised to pulp. Without even knowing a sigh left his lips as he looked through the mapping of their mission today once more which was displayed on the large screen.

Yet his thoughts couldn't help but feel this sensation which made him want to punch the air and thrash his head into a wall. Even though Haechan knew this probably wasn't the best way to approach this, the beeping of his earpiece, and tension in his muscles caused by the adrenaline pumping through his veins at the moment; it all blurred his thoughts.

"Haechan hyung we need you in. Mark hyung is already there,"

They were here to find intel on an alleged attack that was rumoured to happen. They were on rival territory. None of them knew how small or big this attack could be which was exactly what they were trying to find out.

Here, standing in front of CHB group's biggest underground casino, the last thing he needed was this. Impulsively, he grabbed his phone and pressed the block button without any second thought.

He slid it into his pocket his, mind blanking out to nothing but the mission. His eyes readjusted to be claimed by dark rage. Human emotions left the chat.

Fuck that shit.

He left the van a sudden gust of colder wind hit him, freezing him into a flow state. The leather jacket did it's best job to keep him warm but that didn't matter as his foot step into the casino. The scent of nicotine, exquisite drugs and alcohol filled his nostrils. Nothing he wasn't used to.