Dysfunctional ~ F.Hargreeves

28} Sky High Guys And Family Roundup

Jenna and Five got back to Elliott's place to find him and Luther knocked out near the laughing gas machine with Bill stumbling around the kitchen.
"Oh my god," Jenna's eyes widened, "What the hell happened here?"
"Oh, this?" Bill messily gestured to the other two men, "Oh, we- we just had a teensie little bit of fun last night."
"Bill-"
"Stop talking, Jenna. I was told last night that I need space from you or something because you hurt my heart and apparently that means that we need a break."

(Night prior)
Luther arrived at Elliott's place in the middle of the night with only a small duffel bag and lamp. He knocked on the door with the lamp and was met with Elliott opening the door.
"Whoa. You're f... uh, from the alley," Elliott stuttered.
"Uh..." Luther ignored him, "I'm looking for Five and Jenna."
"Uh, they went out," Elliott replied as Luther pushed himself inside.
"Say where they were going?"
"Um..."
"They're with your brother," Bill announced from the kitchen where he was pouring himself a glass of whiskey.

"Who, Diego?" Luther went deeper into the apartment, "I thought he was in the asylum."
"He escaped," Bill shrugged, "Catch up."
"They say when they'd be back?"
"Not sure," Elliott stared at Luther in awe.
"Okay," He sighed and plopped himself down on the couch where Bill sat next to him.
"Did you have a bad day, too?" Bill nudged his foot.
"Yep."
"Oooh, I have an idea," Elliott pointed to a canister, "Y'all want some nitrous?"

The three of them sat in a line up, each taking turns breathing in the gas and laughing their asses off together. Everything around them turned all fuzzy and hilarious, but it was the best any of them had felt in a while.
"I should've been doing this my whole life," Luther giggled as he pulled the mask from his face.
"Yeah," Elliott laughed back, "It just makes everything better, right?"
"Oh, yeah," Bill took the mask from Luther.
"How'd you get all this stuff?" Luther asked.
"My dad..." Elliott broke out laughing, "was a dentist. He left me this place in his will when he died."
"You know, uh," Luther chimed in, "my dad died too. He left me on the moon."
The entire room erupted in hysterics.

"My uh," Bill chuckled, "My dad left when I was in diapers and my mom had awful taste in guys, so I've had like fifty step-dads in like twenty different states!"
"Hey, at least you two went places," Elliott added, "I don't leave the house except between 9:00 and 10:00 a.m. Monday through Friday, and when it's daylight on Wednesday."
"Why?" Luther barely got out through his laughter.
"I have my reasons."
"You are super weird."
"What?"
"You are so weird."
"Well... you- you're an alien from the future, and you look like an ape."
Luther sat in silence for a second reflecting before saying, "I do," And keeling over laughing once more.

"You know," Luther continued, "In the last twelve hours, I lost a fight, my job, and the woman that I love loves someone else. I mean, what is that?"
"Hey," Bill slapped his arm, "The woman I love is apparently a fifty-eight-year-old trapped in a seventeen-year-old's body and is married! How crazy is that? Plus, she's from the future and has lighting hands! And on top of all of that, she pushed me away when I kissed her."
"Wait, you kissed Jenna?" Luther stopped laughing for a second, "Like, my sister-in-law? Yeah, she loves Five too much. You're out of luck, buddy."
"Well," Elliott started to share, "My wife left me for my best friend on our tenth anniversary."
Again, everyone broke out into even more laughter.

"Don't worry, okay?" Luther grabbed his shoulder, "She'll be dead in seven days. We all will."
"Oh, thank god," Bill giggled more, "Cause I can't stand the pain I'm going through. It must all end. Hand me the gas again, would ya big boy?"
"Hey, don't take it too harshly," Luther handed him the mask, "Jenna and Five have been married for like thirty years I think. Plus, I think you're, like, her dad or some shit. You just need a break from her is what I think."
"What!?"
"I don't know what I'm talking about, though. Whoa, anyone else feeling tired?" Luther looked over to see Elliott already asleep, "Well, I can go to bed I guess. Night, Bill."
"Night..."
(End of flashback thingy)