Dysfunctional ~ F.Hargreeves

49} The Mothers Of Agony

"Well," Klaus clapped his shoes together in his hands, "That went great!" He threw them on the ground before setting up shots for himself, Jenna, and Five at the bar.
"I don't want one," Jenna pushed her glass away.
"The world's ending," Klaus reasoned, "Why not?"
"Because drinking was one thing that haunted me when I was younger and, as cheesy as it sounds, I want to stay sober right now despite the fact that the world's ending."
"Awe," He cooed, riffling her hair slightly, "So much better than Five and I. There," He poured Five's shot and slid it to him.
"Thanks," Five accepted, "I saw my future self die."
"That's crazy," Klaus exaggerated, "Almost the exact same thing happened to me. But I didn't die, but I did, but..."

"He told me not to save the world," Five ignored his brother and continued on, "And then he died. What do you think he meant by that?"
"Well, shouldn't you know?" Klaus leaned closer to Five over the counter.
"Shouldn't you know about your- never mind."
"Well," Klaus held his shot glass up with Five and Jenna's empty one, "Up your ass."
"Salud," Five toasted.
"Get wasted, bitches!" Jenna cheered them on.

"Klaus," Five said as soon as he brought the glass back from his lips, "I've dedicated my entire life to stopping the apocalypse. Apocalypses, plural. And he tells me... that it's- it's, what? It's meaningless?"
"Maybe you should listen to yourself-" Jenna tried to reason, but her husband continued on, ignoring her just like he'd done to Klaus.
"Maybe that's his way of saying not to become him, but..."
"Oh, you're really messed up about this, huh?" Klaus realized.
"I've cheated time so much, I guess I just figured I'd somehow cheat death," Five spilled this thoughts, "But it turns out, I die a one-armed nightmare inside a bureaucratic hellscape of my own design with zero clue of where Jenna is, if she was even still alive."
"Spoiler alert!" Klaus joked, trying to lighten the mood.
"Not to mention the trashy tattoo," Five pulled out the slab of chest skin from his pocket and threw it onto the counter.
"The fuck, Five?" Jenna groaned in disgust, "You kept that on you? Where's the other one? The one I'm supposed to match with?"

"Ugh!" Klaus cringed, "Is this your skin?"
"I'll be damned if I go out with an old man tramp stamp," Five grimaced as he looked over the design.
"If you don't wanna end up like this guy, why don't you just do something completely different?" Klaus suggested, "Completely different- move upstate, become an alpaca farmer. Oooh! Maybe do whatever Jenna's always wanted to do."
"We could," Five grabbed Jenna's hand with a squeeze, giving her a sliver of hope for their future, "The timeline's malleable. We've proven that much. I can try and break the cycle, but-"
"Yeah, sure," Klaus pointed to Five's arms, "Just keep your arms and extremities away from sharp objects, and don't join the Mothers of Agony."

"What?"
"The tattoo. It's the symbol of the biker gang, the Mothers of Agony. Like two timelines ago, they were... how do I put it? My farmacistas."
"This is good," Five tucked the skin away, "Maybe I can figure something out without Jenna having to spill her secret."
"Her what?" Klaus quirked up an eyebrow, "Oh, that she's-"
"Thanks Klaus," Five grabbed Jenna's hand and spatial jumped them away.
My head can't take anymore jumping around.

The couple reappeared right in front of the Mothers of Agony bar. They pushed and wiggled their way through a crowd of bikers and motorcycles until they finally found their way inside. Once in, Five tugged Jenna close to him upon seeing tons of questionable individuals staring them down.
"You kids lost?" One of the men laughed at them.
Jenna flipped him off and continued walking past a stripper who was in the center of the room.
"You better keep your eyes looking forward," Jenna threatened her husband, "Or I will gut you."
"Eyes are forward," Five gulped, "No need to get violent, Love."
At the far end of the room they approached a 'Members Only' door, which Five immediately opened without hesitation. Inside was a small, dingy tattoo studio.
"I've been looking for you," Five told the tattoo artist.
The artist turned around from his client and revealed himself to be none other than Pogo.