Bastiana has a loving family, two amazing best friends, and a secret.
Over summer vacation, Bastiana and her besties do their best to focus on their bucket list in order to distract them from all the secrets they're keeping from one another. When a...
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"I still don't understand why you won't just tell me what the calls were about last weekend." Carter whines as we leave the craft store.
I spent all week screening my calls and blocking numbers that kept calling back. Asher got them to take down the ad and stopped them from running it again, but that one physical paper couldn't be erased. It was still out there, lingering and causing trouble for me.
Though Carter had been in the room for the initial calls, she didn't know their nature or what we'd found out about them. As far as I was concerned, no one else needed to know about them. Ryker, Asher, Abi and Jaxon already knew, and that was more than enough. I wish Jaxon hadn't found out, but there was nothing I could do about that now.
I hadn't even told Nico about it. He and I were already arguing enough, I didn't want to add more fuel to that particular fire. I mostly just wanted to avoid another argument about reporting her and letting adults work out the problem, because Nico insisted that I tell someone about Brittany bullying me so that they could make her stop, but I wasn't about to look weak like that. Brittany was a petty bitch and I could handle her. There was no need to make a big deal out of it. I can solve my own problems, even if Nico thinks I can't.
But there was a part of me that had another reason for not telling Nico. I was afraid he wouldn't believe me. Most of the arguments we've had recently have been about trust, moreover, his lack of trust in me. I know his worries aren't totally unfounded, but I still feel like I'm being unduly punished. The kiss with Jaxon was more than four months ago, and nothing else has happened since then.
Nico's been acting clingy and jealous since September, and it's really starting to wear on our relationship. He still insists that I don't go to any parties without him, and after the Halloween debacle I'm not too inclined to let him go to any alone either.
Nico and I have been on an endless cycle lately, and I'm beginning to resent it.
We fight, which usually begins about something small but always seems to come back to my infidelity and his lack of trust in me. Then, he says something completely out of line, causing me to walk away and give him the cold shoulder for a day or two. So, he'll come over or walk up to me at school with an apology and a crooked grin, begging for forgiveness. I relent every time and forgive him, too wrapped up in my own guilt over the kiss from last summer to stay mad at him for some angry words said in the heat of the moment. And we inevitably end up in his car or his bed, having make-up sex.
It's a vicious cycle that I can't seem to find a way out of. His lips on my skin always make me forget why I'm upset and the movement of his hands across my skin pull moans of forgiveness from me every time.
Part of me knows that this probably isn't healthy, emotionally, but most of me doesn't care. My feelings for Nico are intense and overwhelming sometimes, and I'm not ready to give that up. I simply resigned myself to working through this phase of our relationship, convinced that the grass will be greener on the other side.
