Cartas sin destinatario y otros poemas

✧ Another Overwhelming Day ✧

13.03.23

How can a couple of words make me feel proud?

How can your smile mean the world to me?

How can your eyes make me blush?

But even with that, I can't like you.

I don't feel my heart racing or butterflies in my stomach.

I don't feel especially nervous around you.

I can talk like every day.

I can laugh and joke.

I'm not complaining, but... where is the nervousness that I should feel?

Where is the "I can't look you in the eyes"?

Where is that shy laugh everyone talks about?

Where are those romantic feelings?

How do I know if I'm feeling it?

I want to be your friend because friends to lovers is the cutest trope in the world, but... why do I want to stop right before the lovers part?

I'm okay with being just a friend, but I'm sure I shouldn't be okay with that.

If I like you, I should want the whole thing?

The kissing and cuddling and holding hands?

I should feel all of it...

The difficult breathing and cartwheels inside.

The unstoppable need of kissing you and the hole inside when you are not around.

I should be helpless at your sight.

I should sigh when I see you.

But I don't.

Why don't I?

Why can't I?