The rookie Groupchat

Tim Bradford and the Case of the Missing Socks

Tim Bradford:
Has anyone seen my socks? I've looked everywhere, and they're gone.

Lucy Chen:
You've seriously lost your socks? Did you try looking in your laundry basket?

Tim Bradford:
It's not that simple, Lucy. They're missing. I'm telling you, they vanished.

Tamara Collins:
Ooh, a sock mystery? This sounds like a you problem, Tim.

Tim Bradford:
I'm not joking, Tamara. I've checked my whole house. No socks. None.

Lucy Chen:
Are you sure? Maybe you just didn't look hard enough. Or... you know, you could've thrown them out by accident?

Tim Bradford:
I would never throw away a good pair of socks. I'm not some kind of sock monster!

Tamara Collins:
Okay, hold up. Are we talking about a singular sock here, or have they both gone rogue?

Tim Bradford:
Both of them! Gone! Missing in action! They're nowhere to be found!

Lucy Chen:
This sounds more like a you problem than an actual mystery, Tim.

Tamara Collins:
I bet you lost them somewhere embarrassing, huh? Like under your couch cushions? Or in the fridge?

Tim Bradford:
I didn't lose them in the fridge, Tamara. I'm not that disorganized.

Lucy Chen:
Have you checked your shoes? Maybe they're stuffed in there.

Tim Bradford:
Yes, I checked my shoes, Lucy! They're not there!

Tamara Collins:
Well, maybe the socks wanted a little vacation from their duties. You know, they've been trapped in shoes for far too long.

Tim Bradford:
I don't need you two making fun of me. I need answers. I'm about to call in the LAPD for a missing sock investigation.

Lucy Chen:
You're seriously going to make the cops search for your socks?

Tim Bradford:
If it comes to that, yes. I will do what it takes.

Tamara Collins:
Okay, okay. Let's break this down. You're telling me that you—Tim Bradford—are sitting there, typing this out to us, and you're missing your socks, but not your dignity?

Tim Bradford:
Don't even start, Tamara. I'm very upset about this, okay?

Lucy Chen:
So, when was the last time you remember having them? Maybe we can piece this together.

Tim Bradford:
I remember wearing them this morning! I got dressed, went to work, and now—poof! Gone. Vanished like magic.

Tamara Collins:
Okay, but you've been home for, what? An hour now? Are you telling me you've been sockless this whole time?

Tim Bradford:
Yes, I've been sockless for over an hour! I feel... incomplete.

Lucy Chen:
Did you look behind the couch? You know, that's where everything seems to end up.

Tim Bradford:
I looked under the couch. There's nothing there. But you're not going to believe this. There's a chewed-up pen under there.

Tamara Collins:
A chewed-up pen? Oh no. I think your socks are trying to escape your chaos, Tim.

Lucy Chen:
Maybe the socks are mad at you for all the times you've treated them poorly. Ever think of that?

Tim Bradford:
I have never treated my socks poorly! I fold them. I wash them properly. I give them all the respect they deserve!

Tamara Collins:
Sounds like a sock revolt to me. Maybe they had enough of your "organization" and staged a break for freedom.

Tim Bradford:
Tamara, stop making jokes. I'm genuinely worried about my socks.

Lucy Chen:
Have you checked the dryer? Sometimes they get stuck in the drum.

Tim Bradford:
Oh, that's where I was going next. If they're in there, I'll be taking back everything I said about them vanishing.

Tamara Collins:
You mean you've been living sockless this whole time while ignoring the dryer?

Tim Bradford:
I didn't want to believe they were in there, okay? But I'm going to check right now.

Lucy Chen:
If they're not in the dryer, I'm going to be very concerned about what's really going on here.

—Tim goes to check the dryer and returns a few minutes later—

Tim Bradford:
I found them.

Tamara Collins:
Where were they?

Tim Bradford:
They were behind the dryer vent.

Lucy Chen:
Wait, you had to go digging behind the dryer for socks?

Tim Bradford:
It was a journey, okay? A quest of epic proportions.

Tamara Collins:
Tim, you were literally on a quest to find socks? This is the most dramatic thing you've done all week.

Lucy Chen:
Honestly, Tim, I thought you were going to tell me you found them in the oven or something. Behind the dryer is almost normal by comparison.

Tim Bradford:
It wasn't normal, okay? I had to move the laundry baskets and get on the floor like some kind of... sock detective.

Tamara Collins:
Sargent Bradford, solving the case of the vanishing socks. Very impressive.

Lucy Chen:
I think it's safe to say that no one could ever accuse you of not caring about your socks, Tim.

Tim Bradford:
You have no idea what I went through. It was like something out of a horror movie. Only instead of monsters, I was battling laundry machines.

Tamara Collins:
But you won. You're the sock hero we needed.

Lucy Chen:
You've defeated the sock thief! A true victory.

Tim Bradford:
I'll take the win. But next time, I'm doing a sock check before I get dressed. No more surprises.

Tamara Collins:
I think we need to start a support group for all those who've experienced "The Great Sock Caper."

Lucy Chen:
Tim, I think you might've just invented a whole new genre of detective work. Forget the LAPD. You're the world's first sock detective.

Tim Bradford:
Just don't tell anyone about this. I have a reputation to uphold.

Tamara Collins:
Too late, Tim. This is going down in history.

Lucy Chen:
Yeah, Tim. A sock detective. It's got a nice ring to it.

Tim Bradford:
I'm never living this down, am I?

Tamara Collins:
Nope. Not in a million years.