Lightning Bolt

CHAPTER SIXTY ONE

BEFORE YOU EMBARK ON A JOURNEY OF REVENGE,

DIG TWO GRAVES.

THEA'S POV

The next morning I decided to go for a run along the seafront to break up the hours before I went to see Matt.

The sea breeze was refreshing and was helping to clear my foggy mind. My eyes were still heavy from my disturbed sleep; I woke myself screaming out Matt's name, clutching at my pillow as my heart hammered loudly in my chest with salty tears streaking my face.

I couldn't wait to see him to try and ease some of my pain. This unbearable discomfort in my chest was overwhelming me.

When my feet began to slide into their stride I let my thoughts drift to him.

I wondered how he would be feeling this morning. From the amount of alcohol he was consuming last night I guessed with a shocking hangover.

I thought about us recently. Our meetings, the dull, flat atmosphere, the snippets of conversation, to the way he now looked. I prayed for the day I would go round and not see the twisted pained mask that he now wore. That one day soon I would see Matt, the real Matt and not the man I had broken in two.

I stopped running looking down the pebbled beach to the place where Matt and I used to sit together, the place where inside my head I allowed myself to talk to Sophie.

My trainers crunched under the uneven surface, my breathing returning to me as I walked slowly down towards the shore. I needed some time here today to collect my thoughts, to listen to the calming sounds of the sea, to let my mind wonder. But the real reason I knew was because I couldn't face going back to my lonely house. It was better to sit here with my memories and to feel close to Sophie and Matt then return to the shell of hell.

The weather was starting to grow warm again, the summer months on their way. I laid back and let my mind travel back to the many summers we shared together.

Our walks along the sand when the tide was so far out you could barely see the beginning of the dull blue water, or over the lush green hills of the South Downs, barbeques, beer gardens and endless Sunday afternoons.

I didn't know what I was going to do with myself this year. All I longed for now was the borrowed time I still got to spend with Matt each week.

**********

I pressed the buzzer and waited patiently. It seemed to be taking him a long time to answer.

Maybe he was struggling to get out of bed?

My bag felt heavy on my shoulder, the nibbles I had bought weighing it down slightly. I had even thrown in a box of headache tablets just in case he was in need and had ran out. I'm sure pills were the last thing on his mind at the moment. I knew he wasn't looking after himself and I would do anything I could to try and help him.

His breathless voice suddenly broke through the small intercom. "Hey, come up".