One Big Mistake

Ch- 22 Out of the Picture

I rummaged through my drawers trying to find decent clothes to wear. Most of my clothes are dirty because mama has been sick for a few days so the laundry is piling up. I know I should do a couple loads but with caring for all my younger siblings and being seven and a half months pregnant you get exhausted easily.

I let out an irritated sigh. I'm absolutely fatigued and beyond tired since my boys wouldn't let me get much more than an hour of sleep last night. These are the times that I could just slap Cole for getting me into this situation. Speaking of the devil, today I'm going with his family to pick him up from the airport. I'll try and be as patient as I can but I am very cranky today so he better not be a jerk to me.

I chose a pair of black leggings with my white pea coat. These tights make me look fat! At this point I couldn't care less about my make up and hair so I tied my hair back into a high ponytail and spread mascara on my eyelashes.

I leaned against the dresser for support as I felt my stomach flip. That's when I realized I haven't ate since five o'clock yesterday. I grabbed everything I would need for when I left since I'm in no mood to hobble up the stairs again once I go down. It took me a minute to carefully make my way down stairs with out sliding down on my butt.

"Hey Dad," I greeted my father as I spotted him in the kitchen.

"Hey Jessalynn," he said shortly. I smiled a quick grin even though it hurt to do so. I wish he could just except that this is my life now instead of being disappointed in me.

"I'm going to the airport in an hour to pick up Cole," I told him hoping to spark a conversation for once.

"Is that a good thing?" He scoffed while pretending to ignore me by reading the local newspaper as he sipped on his piping hot coffee.

"Yes daddy it is," I stated firmly hoping he'd note my tone. He glanced up from the newspaper and returned to reading it. "He is the father of my sons dad and I intend to have a good relationship with him," I opened the fridge and pulled out a Yogurt hoping it would be enough.

He didn't say anything in reply so I stomped out irritatedly and took a seat in the living room. Are there going to be any more bad things today or is God done playing cruel jokes on me?

I finished my yogurt and told everybody goodbye when Carly pulled into my driveway.

The ride was longer than I would have liked. They own a spacious SUV so that's nice but still sitting in the car for a long period of time sucks.

I guess you could say that I'm a bit nervous but not for the obvious reasons. I'm nervous because I know how he is and I know how I am and our personalities clash. We will say anything when we're angry and like my family believes, I'm going to get hurt. I knew they were right when they warned me but the letters and last phone call were all so hopeful. I want to give him the benefit of the doubt but nobody can change in a couple of months.

The car ride was filled with questions for me. So many questions I felt that jumping out of the car on the highway might be a good idea. "Are you excited for Cole to be back?" Carly asked me as she turned to face me from the passenger seat.

"Something like that." I responded with a small smile and continued to stare at the fast moving scenery outside of the car window.

"Are you happy that you are having sons?" She questioned again while pulling out her phone and typing.

"Yes I am. If they are anything like Cole I'm going to have my work cut out for me." I tried to lengthen my replies so I didn't seem rude. I played with my stomach as I thought about this morning and how the babies haven't moved much today.