How Does It Go?..

I Tried

For the past couple of weeks

I tried to change the ways I thought about these shit situations

You know.. The ones that brought me nightmares every night

Made me cry almost every day

It was all I ever thought about

I could add more but.. Yea

Anyway these situations

I tried to make myself feel better

Forget about it. Get over it. Distract myself

I tried so fucking hard

I started telling people I loved them more and tried to give and recieve more hugs and affection

Idk if the changes were shown in the life friend chapters but in the earlier ones I think I said 'love you' less to my friends

I just wanted to feel happy again

And after so long of just.. Crying

I really wanted to feel better.. And I almost got there too..

I had/have made these new ish friends that made me happy again

Every night I'd talk to them and throughout my shit day at school, I'd say to myself 'you get to talk to those people when you get home'.

They made my life a lot happier.. And still continue to at times but just less now

Long story short, I made efforts to be happy, but i still had all these thoughts in the back of my mind which have ultimately continued to make me unhappy..

I think I want a point to this chapter

And I think my point is that.. Even though it didn't fix the situation.. You should be yourself more

(As long as yourself isn't the biggest whore ever) and I know you've allllll heard this a lot but be the best version of you, you can be..

Just don't let another person change you.. I'm actually very glad that I've started hugging people more, because hugs do help me Feel better for even just a bit..

And I think that.. I can get through this, with the hugs from my friends..

Because I know people care about me..

-Arasnnie