How Does It Go?..

Who Am I?

I'm not depressed at all

I'm happy

Besides not liking how easily I can gain weight, I like my body mostly

I just hate how I'm so weird

I look back at myself and I don't even know if that's the real me

Idk the real me

Cause when I look back I literally just think how do people even like me, I'm so annoying I annoy myself

I see it annoying people sometimes too

But because of who I am in that moment I don't stop

And Jesus Christ I don't like me half the time

But always being happy makes me a crazy person like just strange and loopy

I don't like who I am sad either tho

And I don't need to be sad, ik that

Just idk who I am

Idk what I want

I still think about reality a lot, which is mostly sad,

Things like how fast life is going and yea just all of those fun thoughts

How I'm just so different with some people and I don't understand why people like me when I'm acting so weird

but for the sake of myself, the people around me and just me knowing that there's no point in being sad, I don't let it get me down

And sorry just ignore that because I am a happy person

Rn I'm not in a great mood (at the time when I wrote most of this)

I'm realizing how people are affecting other peoples lives constantly

Majority of our sadness is because of other people

And I'm sure I've already said that

Just we don't want other people to affect our emotions so much but we can't control it easily

Its annoying, but its life

And we wish we could change it but we can't

Sometimes its a good thing, sometimes bad

And if you aren't the kind of person to be able to still see the great things during one of those bad times, then you can become sad for longer than needed

Its just annoying how we can't be in control of our own emotions really easily

Though of course we can control our feelings.. And if anyone can control them, its only ever going to be us. Its just overwhelmingly hard sometimes (like my dick) and not everyone gets to the point where they can control themselves fully and confidently

I think we need to get our priorities in life straight and just understand what we want

Then aim for it with caution, but that's our aim, and we gradually build to it.

Anyway what was I saying?

Oh yea

Idk who I am

Idk what I want

Idk what to do

And idk how to feel half the time

Its all a bit complicated

And I know that half of you feel the same way x

But..

I know we have each other to help one another through

To help each other find what we want

To help each other find who we are..

-------------------------

And you guys are my family xx

-Arasnnie