A COLLECTION OF MY FEELINGS

Soar

Hey ,im 16
As of yesterday I lost my grandfather
The person I relied on more than my own father
I laid there and cried screaming why's
I learned through an fb post
Pretended it was a lie...
But I broke down
Who wouldn't right?
To know that someone that models you just died
I was already low
Was that supposed to make me high?
I didn't do depression I did a reality check
I got some lessons from the situation I met
Like..
-Nothing lasts forever, even the things that you cherish
-at the end of the day everyone will perish
- people say he's looking down. ... I still believe there's no heaven
- reincarnation though he's gonna be a good gentleman...
- Try your hardest to remember their life
I cried, then got into an argument, and cried right through
I can't talk to you
I need to see myself through
That was my grandpa damnit
My everything,
He did nothing wrong to me
He was my perfection
What I aspired to be
He made money and still woke up as long as he had coffee
He was on his grind in his 70's so dont expect me to just turn the other cheek
It's over now
His life has left
Just like at one point all the rest
I never even got to say goodbye
Look him into his shiny eyes
Tell him about all the times
I would realize that the age difference didn't matter
But i couldn't try
He was in a different country at the time
He loved me that was a truth....
I knew it... I grew up with that. .
Feeling of understanding
Anything I wanted he spoiled me
It shouldn't be
That that man who worked so hard for others
Lost his life and one has to live another
I will never be the same
Nor will I try
Ima take this feeling
Till the day I die
Have my kids in tears
With this understanding
That all planes fly...
But some are forced into landing...
And that you should cry.
And goodnight