Terrible Things (Harry Styles Love Story)

Chapter Twenty - Nine

December...

"She what?"

"She told me what happened between you two."

"What are you talking about? Harry, come with me," I said, bringing him inside the house and straight up to my room. "My mom - she mixes up the stories. And maybe she did this time. Maybe she didn't. And quite frankly I don't want to know what she said. So I'm just going to tell you what happened between Zayn and me."

Harry blinked somewhat cluelessly. "Wh-What?"

"I'm going to tell you what happened. But before I do, you need to promise me - right now - that you won't judge me for any of this, you won't look at me any differently. You won't do anything except listen."

He thought hard about it. "I don't know if I can hear it... I've only heard what your mom told me, and I'm already freaking out."

"Fine, then what do you want to know?"

Harry sighed. "Just tell me this... did you sleep with him?"

I shut my eyes, not believing that I was actually telling Harry this. "Yes."

Harry let his arm drop to his side. He let out a breathe, but it made me break inside. It was as if he was just so disappointed in me or something.

Rushing towards him, "But I regretted it right after. I didn't even like him. I just slept with him. Plus, you can really blame me. I didn't know you at that time." I half lied again.

"So why did you regret it?" he asked.

"W-what?" I stuttered.

He wasn't panicking anymore. He was calm. "You said you regretted it. Why?"

It caught me off guard. "Because I didn't love him. And I thought I liked him... but I didn't. I don't. I just slept with him to sleep with him. And right after, I thought to myself 'what the hell did I just do?'" I kept lying about my feelings for Zayn, and every time I felt myself getting into a deeper hole.

"Is it true? What your mom told me?"

I furrowed my eyebrows. "What did she tell you?"

"You know."

And I did. "No, I don't."

Harry suddenly looked choked up. He shut his eyes tightly. "Diana, please don't make me say it."

"Fine...Yes, it's true. I was um.. I got... well, I yeah, I was pregnant," I said, cringing at the thought. Of course I wanted to get pregnant. But not until I was married.

"Well, what happened? To the baby, I mean?"

"Miscarriage at three months."

It was silent. No one spoke. No one moved. The only sounds that were heard were the sounds coming from the first floor where everyone else was.

"Are you mad at me?" I asked hesitantly.

I could tell that he was thinking really hard about his answer. I knew he was mad at me, but I knew that he knew he couldn't tell me how he felt about this. "No."

And I just accepted his lie. Because he was just looking out for me, and my wrist of course.

~~~

Christmas passed and the days went on and soon it was December 30th - the day before New Years Eve. I guess you could say that me and Harry are doing okay. We fight, but what couple doesn't. I've been cutting, but with the help of makeup, I was able to cover them up so Harry wouldn't find out.