The Calm Before The Storm

Author's Notes

Life is Strange saved my life. Now I know what you're thinking, how could a video game save someone's life. Well, here's the thing... it's not just a game... it's an experience, one that got me back on the right path in life. Before I found Life is Strange I was very depressed, like... dark thoughts depressed and... I remember searching through Jacksepticeye's playlist collection at 2 o'clock in the morning for something to watch and finding three 2 hour videos about a game I had never heard of and frankly had no interest in. I figured I'd just watch it until I was bored out of my mind and eventually fell asleep, but what I found was amazing. I was hooked on Doctor Who at the time and loved anything that had to do with time travel, so when I first saw our shy cliche hipster protagonist... I felt...connected, like... I had something in common with this character. And sure enough, Max and I share a lot of the same fear, we're both talkative and quiet all at the same time. And we had one person in life... that after years apart, opened our hearts. I had a real life Chloe and... I didn't really understand my feeling but... they were there and they were for her. I won't go into detail about that because... well, that side of the story is rather personal and as much as I'd like to share it... I can't. So, I watch all the videos (Chrysalis- Chaos Theory) and immediately fell in love. I didn't start out shipping Pricefield, because well, homosexuality was still kinda new to me. I grew up with... I don't want to say homophobic but yeah, parents who didn't really teach or tell me anything about girls liking girls and boys liking boys. But by the time I played Episode 5: Polarized and watched Max and Chloe kiss... like... kiss for reals, it didn't seem weird. It felt so natural and normal and...oddly comforting. I started to think why that was. Let's just say the game made me look at my whole life and re-evaluate it. I saw that throughout my whole life... I've liked both boys and girls. The realization was shocking and frankly, it made me scared. So I hid my discovery for months, unsure how to... tell my parents that I'm... well, queer. When I finally came out, my mom was...shocked I guess, she didn't really have a reaction and neither did my dad. They both said not to think too much about it, that I shouldn't rush into decisions like that. While writing this right now, I realized that... They didn't want me to be the way I am... and that sucks because come on... parents always tell you never to be ashamed of who you are. I struggled for a whole year, forced to keep my newfound identity a secret. My parents closeted me and that's so not right. So, I guess as a coping mechanism, I started writing my fears into my Life is Strange fan fiction and well, it helped... a lot. I started talking to the kind people over at LifeisStrangeFans.com and found so much support, I've gotten so much support on this site as well and I thank everybody for that. As of March 23, 2017, I came out to the rest of my family as Bisexual, everyone is... well struggling with it, but I'm thankful for the friends I have who are helping me through this hard time. My mother seems to be the one struggling the most, even comparing having my pride flag hanging up on the wall to having a swastika up. I don't understand her and she doesn't understand me, maybe we're not meant to, but I hope someday in the future we can settle our differences and become the strong family we once were. Life is Strange has been there for me, the game has given me a wonderful fandom that hungers for new content and I'm glad I'm able to contribute. This fan fiction has kept me going, giving me a reason to see the future, and even though it's over, I will continue to write. I'm actually trying to come up with an original story about coming out and finding true love through loss and pain.

Now, to actually talk about the fan fiction instead of my personal life. In its original layout, 'The Calm Before The Storm' started out with 7 chapters and moved up to 21 with the car accident never happening. It was just an idea about how fucked up it would be if something catastrophic happened at a sweet, tender, unexpected moment. It was just a thought, a side note, nothing really important to what I thought was a steady storyline. But adding a bit of emotional strain (including one of my biggest fears of car accidents) gave the story some much-needed angst. As I progressed with the story, occasionally adding moments of fluff, I started getting a handle on my characters and their development and deterioration.

Sexuality, coming out mental issues, and homophobia were major topics throughout the story because whilst writing this, I struggled with the same things. The story was supposed to be separated into 3 parts, "The Calm Before The Storm" being Chapters 1-20, "Enter the Storm" being Chapters 21-57, and "Aftermath" being what it is today, the original (alternate) ending. But seeing that a break-up was a cheap way to end things, I rewrote things until I was satisfied with giving my girls a proper send-off.

Now for the Voice, AKA: Rachael Amber herself. She was never meant to be anything more than well, just a voice in Max's head. There was no antagonist planned, like... ever. She too was just a thought. But, thinking of how bland my story was getting, watered down with sad and mushy dialogue, I needed some much needed... well, the story needed a concept that made you so confused that you don't know what the fuck was going on. The game made a good point of the possibility of the tornado being Rachael's revenge, like... it was just one line and a thought never spoke about again. I used that to my advantage and came up with the idea that Rachael would both torture Max for her choices and for denying any of the destruction was her fault. Cause and Effect, Action and Reaction. Most events that happened in the story is karma. The car accident is karma for Max letting/killing Chloe die in the Alternate Universe. Max's injuries from the accident and treatments (Ventilator) are karma for that as well. If Max had even just said 'yes' to Warren's request, the would have still been friends, so him cutting her off is Karma. As for the slow deterioration of Max's sanity, I mean... like I said before, anyone who's gone through as much as she has is bound to be a bit fucked up in the head. I love it when I find a fanfic that goes all the way with that because... it's logical.

References: You can clearly tell I'm a fucking nerd from all the references I have hidden within all my work. From 'If I Stay' to 'Gone Home' to 'Undertale'. See if you can find them all ;P

Anywho, thanks again for reading:

"In peace may you leave the shore. In love may you find the next. Safe passage on your travels until our final journey on the ground... May we meet again".